Good afternoon. Gigi the Parti poodle here to introduce this week’s blog. Bernard D. Bunny pulled the van up to Chrispin’s abode, which was essentially the wooded area by the curb of the cul de sac where the van was parked before.

 He calmly strolled up to the passenger’s side of the van where I was sitting. As he approached, I cautiously rolled down the window. He sat on his haunches and asked, “Where are the catnappers?”

“In the van”, I barked.

“You going to open the door?”

I narrowed my eyes. “Perhaps.” I turned to Bernard and said, “Crispin wants us to open the door.”

“Not a chance,” Bernard said. “He’s a bloodthirsty predator.”

“Which is why we drove the catnappers here to be delt with.”

“How are we going to get the catnappers out of the van if we don’t open the door?”

“A fair question.”

Bernard pointed his paw forward. “We could tell Crispin to stand way over there at the edge of the cul de sac and then we could have Charlotte and Ruffles slide open the side door, push the catnappers out and then slam the door back shut.”

“Good idea. Let me tell Charlotte and Ruffles the plan.” I hurried back to Charlotte and whispered the idea to her.

“I will be ready when you are,” she said.

Then I hopped over to Ruffles and told him the plan as well. “I can do that,” he said. “I can do that.”

“Fantastic,” I said and then hurried back to Bernard. “Let’s tell Crispin to move back to the edge of the cul de sac and we’ll open the door and roll them out and shut the door.”

“What are you doing?” the woman in the olive raincoat said.

“We’ve taken you back to where you started,” I said.

“This isn’t the parking lot.”

I ignored her and ran back to the passenger seat. “Crispin?”

“Yes,” Crispin said.

“I need you to go over to the opposite side of the cul de sac and we’ll open the door and roll them out.”

“Why should I do that?”

“You’re a blood thirsty predator.”

“I take offence to that.”

“I apologize but you need to see it from our point of view.”

He shrugged, lifted his paw and studied his claws. “Where’s my toy?”

“Don’t worry, I have your toy. My novelist got me a new one and I will bring it to you. And just remember, we don’t want you to attack we just want you to terrify.”

“Terrifying is my thing.”

“Great.”

“Which stuffed toy is it?”

“What?”

“Which stuffed toy is it?”

“A leopard.”

“Awesome.”

Crispin rose and began walking over to the other side of the cul de sac when a pair of headlights pulled in behind the van. Bernard looked in the rearview mirror and motioned for me to come back to the front. “It’s the man with the shaved head and tattoos,” he told me.

I looked up in the rearview mirror. The man turned off his headlights and started to dismount the garish orange Hummer. “Our plan remains the same. Let’s do it.”

“What about Crispin? He can’t take on all three of them.”

“I thought you said he was a blood thirsty predator.”

“He is but he’s still on our side.”

“You have a point. Let’s stick with the plan but not leave. If Crispin needs help, we still have the van.”

“Can’t the man just hop back in the Hummer and mow us over?”

“Belle, I have a job for you.”

“Okay,” Belle said meekly.

“I want you to hop up here on the dash and watch the man with the shaved head and tattoos. If he heads back to the Hummer, I need you to jump on the horn.”

“I can do that.”

“Good. Now we have an alarm system. Bernard, get ready.”

“Okay,” Bernard said.

“Charlotte, Ruffles, open the Pod Bay doors!”

Until next week, I bid you adieu.

MY BOOKS

You can check out my books Chicane and all five installments of the Musicology book series Musicology: Volume One, Baby!, Musicology: Volume Two, Kid!, Musicology: Volume Three, Twist!, Musicology: Volume Four, Sweetie! and Musicology: The Epiquad on Amazon in Kindle and Paperback editions. You can also check out Musicology’s web site at www.musicologyrocks.com and vote for who you think will win Musicology!

STREAM OF THE WEEK: THE GOOD, THE BAD AND THE UGLY (1966)-AMAZON PRIME, PLUTO, ROKU, TUBI

It’s hard to believe that one of the greatest westerns ever made was not nominated for a single Oscar. To be fair, it was a tough year with In the Heat of the Night, Bonnie and Clyde, The Graduate, Cool Hand Luke and Guess Who’s Coming to Dinner all nominated in the same year. Yet, there was still plenty of room for this incredible never a dull moment classic to take its place at the table.

If you ask your parents, or maybe grandparents, they will tell you before video, DVD, Tivo, and the Internet, every May for five days straight was Clint Eastwood Week. This meant every night, Monday thru Friday at 8:00 pm sharp you needed to be in your chair in front of the television ready to watch one of five great films starring a thirtysomething man who would become a movie star, composer, and four-time Oscar winner twice for director and twice for producer. And the zenith of all the cinema for that short run was this timeless western classic about three anti-heroes in search of buried gold.

The film was directed by the incredibly talented Sergio Leoni who is the mind behind the first two films about the Man with No Name. The story takes place during the Civil War where two outlaw drifters run a scam to collect bounty money. Tuco (Eli Wallach who should have been nominated for an Oscar for his landmark performance) is wanted…for a lot of crimes: murder, armed robbery, theft of sacred objects, kidnapping, rape, statutory rape, counterfeiting and passing counterfeit money, bigamy, desertion, inciting prostitution, receiving and selling stolen goods, using marked cards and loaded dice, highway robbery, cattle rustling, derailing a train to rob passengers, hiring himself out as a wagon train guide and deserting, misrepresenting himself as a Mexican general, intention to sell fugitive slaves, illegal postal pickup, assaulting a Justice of the Peace, and vandalism and arson in places of high authority.

Tuco (the ugly) is captured by the Man with No Name (the good) which Tuco refers to as Blondie (Clint Eastwood in his iconic role) and drug into the nearest town. The town then pays Blondie the bounty, and Tuco is put on a horse with his hands tied behind his back and a noose around his neck. When they are about to set the horse free, Blondie, an excellent marksman, shoots the rope sending the horse running with Tuco free on its back. These two have been pulling this con for a while.

In the meantime, a man dressed all in black (the bad) named Sentenza aka Angel Eyes (played with gleeful villainy by Lee Van Cleef), a gun for hire, hunts down a man family man named Stevens (Antonio Casas). Stevens, a former Confederate soldier knows the whereabouts of a man named Bill Carson (Antonio Casale) who knows where $200,000 is hidden. As Angel Eyes hunts for Bill Carson, Tuco and Blondie find themselves at odds with each other and in a moment of sheer luck stumble into knowledge about where the $200,000 might be.