Good afternoon. It is I Gigi the parti poodle here to introduce this week’s blog. Bernard D. Bunny drove the van out of the restaurant parking lot with his little sister Belle working the peddles. Ruffles had the woman in the silk camo dress pinned down to the floor while Charlotte had the woman in the olive trench coat pinned down to the floor as well. The cats circled all around our vile villain to make sure she did not get up any time soon.

“Who is Crispin?” the woman in the silk camo dress demanded.

“You will find out soon enough,” I barked at her.

Bernard flew around the corner, over the bridge, and plowed down the hill with Belle working the peddles. “We could use a little help,” he said.

I turned and told Bruiser the Jack Russell Terrier to help Belle with the peddles.

Bruiser leaped over and took over on the break as Belle continued to man the gas pedal.

The woman in the olive trench coat attempted to get up and all the cats leaned in and hissed at her like cobras. The woman relented but shouted, “We have a right to know who Crispin is!”

Demeter had a right to walk down the sidewalk of her neighborhood without getting kidnapped by a black market catnapper too, I shouted back. Shut your mouth and do not yell at me again!

“Poodles,” she said. “The vilest of all dog breeds.” The twin dachshunds hurried over and began licking her face. “Stop that! Stop that I say!”

I took out my cellphone and dialed 411. “Information,” the woman on the other end said.

I need the number for Crispin Z. Coyote.

“Just a moment, please.”

“Crispin has a cell phone?” Madeline the British Shorthair asked.

Doesn’t everyone?

“My owner won’t let me have one. She’s afraid I’ll become a screen addict.”

“I have the number for you,” Information said over the telephone. She told me the number and I dialed Crispin.

“Who is this?” Crispin answered with a snarl.

This is Gigi the parti poodle.

“Who?”

The toy poodle from earlier this evening. The one in the van.

“I didn’t think we’d cross paths again so soon, curly.”

Be that as it may, I have a couple of catnappers who need a comeuppance.

“What’s it to me?”

You are one of the animals in the neighborhood. This concerns you too.

“Uh…no. I’m a wild animal, see. A loaner to boot. I’m not some pampered indoor pet.”

Neither are Bernard D. Bunny and his little sister Belle.

“Who?”

The rabbits you were chasing when you came across our van.

“Oh yeah, them. So, what?”

They are driving the van as we speak.

“Why?”

We have the catnappers in custody.

“In custody?”

Yes. And we want you to reprimand them.

“Why don’t you just call the police?”

We believe this matter should be handled by those of the resident animal kingdom.

“You never included me before in your resident animal kingdom. Why should I help you now?”

In exchange for your efforts, you will receive a proper bath.

“A…bath?”

Yes.

“I’m listening.”

A bath and…a chewy toy.

“A chewy toy. I wouldn’t mind a chewy toy.”

We will see you in fifteen minutes.

“I always wanted a chewy toy.”

Until next week, dear readers. I bid you adieu.

MY BOOKS

You can check out my books Chicane and all five installments of the Musicology book series Musicology: Volume One, Baby!, Musicology: Volume Two, Kid!, Musicology: Volume Three, Twist!, Musicology: Volume Four, Sweetie! and Musicology: The Epiquad on Amazon in Kindle and Paperback editions. You can also check out Musicology’s web site at www.musicologyrocks.com and vote for who you think will win Musicology!

STREAM OF THE WEEK: PROJECT HAIL MARY (2026)-AMAZON PRIME

The biggest head scratcher about this week’s pick is that it wasn’t released in the fall. Clearly, this is an Oscar contender for several categories including Best Picture. Clearly the script, the performances, the direction, the cinematography, the sets, the editing, and the fantastic special effects are all tip top. It has an 8.2 at IMDB and a 95% positive at Rotten Tomatoes. The Martian, from the same novelist, was released on October 2, 2015, and frankly, I thought this was a better film. I saw it on streaming and can’t imagine how fantastic it must have looked on the big screen. So, it is a bit of a conundrum as to why this movie was released on March 20th. That isn’t even a summer blockbuster release date. What were they thinking? Seriously, what were they thinking? Hollywood never fails to baffle me with their inability to tell brilliant from mediocre and their constant barrage of peculiar decisions.

That said, if you haven’t guessed already, this is an excellent sci-fi film. And coming in at two hours and thirty-six minutes it never has a dull moment. It’s at once charming, heartbreaking entertaining, intelligent, and tense. It was masterfully co-directed by Phil Lord and Christopher Miller, with a great script by Drew Goddard from the book of the same name by sci-fi darling Andy Weir, cinematography by Greig Fraser, editing by Joel Negron, and production design by Charles Wood.

The story is about Ryland Grace (brilliantly played by Ryan Gossling), a middle school teacher who was once a brilliant molecular biologist. His paper on speculative astrobiology has caught the attention of Eva Stratt (well-played by Sandra Hüller) who heads up the Petrova Taskforce. It has been discovered that there is a “Petrova line” or rather a line from the Sun to Venus which is filled with infrared light called “astrophage” which is essentially destroying the Sun. This will cause a massive world-wide cooling of the Earth within thirty years. In fact, the same situation is happening to all the nearby solar systems to earth…save one. A place called the Tau Ceti system. Eva enlists Ryland to work on the team of scientists who will send a small group of astronauts to the Tau Ceti system to figure out why this is the only one that is immune. Unfortunately, it is a suicide mission in that Earth will only have enough fuel to send them out and only enough fuel for their messages to return.

Ryland is only supposed to assist the other scientists in the planning of the mission. But when an unexpected event leaves key members of the crew dead, Stratt decides Ryland is the only one left who can take their place. Ryland wakes up out of a coma to find he is the only one who survived out of the three people on board the ship and is left on his own to try and save Earth…that is until he comes across an unexpected alien named Rocky (wonderfully voiced by James Ortiz).