Good afternoon. It is I Gigi the parti poodle here once again on a summer Thursday to introduce the eleventh chapter of my story Corn Maze. This week my novelist and I came across a Stacker article called the 100 Best Films of All Time According to Data. Here were their criteria:

“To explore the 100 best films of all time, Stacker analyzed IMDb ratings and Metascores to create a unique score equally weighting the two. Only English-language movies released in the U.S. were considered for the list. Additionally, each movie needed at least 20,000 votes on IMDb, and if the movie didn’t have a Metascore, it was not included.”-Stacker

Sadly, we found only sixty films on the list we thought solidly worthy of the honor of best films of all time. This made us concerned that perhaps American movie watchers may not be viewing a large enough collection of quality work. And this is despite their enormous access to streaming content. We decided, therefore, to find and comprise a list of eighty-five English-language films released in the U.S. of all of which we believe were as good and, in most cases, better than the forty that did make the list. And on that sad note, here is chapter eleven of Corn Maze, and here is our list of eighty-five stellar films that failed to make the cut:

Mr. Smith Goes to Washington

Fargo

Whatever Happened to Baby Jane?

Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs

Lawrence of Arabia

Rocky

The Bridge on the River Kwai

Patton

A Place in the Sun

One Flew Over the Cuckoo’s Nest

High Noon

A Clockwork Orange

Midnight Cowboy

Precious

Jaws

Close Encounters of the Third Kind

The Graduate

Doctor Zhivago

It Happened One Night

The African Queen

Flight of the Phoenix (original)

The Sound of Music

West Side Story (original)

Full Metal Jacket

Sunset Boulevard

In the Heat of the Night

The Hustler

Dog Day Afternoon

The Terminator

Butch Cassidy and the Sundance Kid

Harold and Maude

Cat on a Hot Tin Roof

To Kill a Mockingbird

From Here to Eternity

Unforgiven

Memento

Dances With Wolves

Bonnie and Clyde

The Deer Hunter

Giant

Shane

American Graffiti

The Third Man

Rebel Without a Cause

Leaving Las Vegas

2001: A Space Odyssey

Ben-Hur

Dances with Wolves

Spartacus

Easy Rider

Rebecca

The Defiant Ones

Deliverance

All the President’s Men

They Shoot Horses Don’t They?

Tootsie

Forest Gump

Five Easy Pieces

The Conversation

Witness

Good Will Hunting

Hoosiers

Stalag 17

Paper Moon

Strangers on a Train

The Usual Suspects

My Man Godfry

Marty

Mississippi Burning

The Magnificent Ambersons

The Third Man

Blue Velvet

Zodiac

A History of Violence

The Royal Tenenbaums

Lost in Translation

Raging Bull

An American in Paris

Blade Runner

Sling Blade

Laura

The Shop Around the Corner

Breakfast at Tiffany’s

Easy Rider

Sideways

Corn Maze

by

Gigi the parti poodle

Chapter Eleven

The night before the competition, Mallory skipped up the steps to Farley’s porch and knocked on the door. When she didn’t get a response, she knocked again. And when she still didn’t get a response, she knocked a third time.

Finally, Farley shuffled around the corner in his green flip flops as he wrapped his black terrycloth robe around himself. He yawned as he tied the belt and stepped up to the door. He opened it and looked through the screen. Upon finding Mallory there a large, crooked grin stretched across his face. He stepped out onto the porch and said, “Well, well. Look what the cat dragged in.”

“I wanted to talk to you before the race tomorrow,” Mallory said.

“Why, surely. Talk.”

“I’d like to go over the ramifications of the bet.”

“Oh, I think we went over the ramifications of the bet a while ago, Mallory.”

“You and I both know you’re going to win.”

“And how do you come to that conclusion?”

“Your maze is better than Harley’s.”

“Shouldn’t you be rooting for your fiancé?”

Mallory smiled wryly. “Aren’t you the slightest bit curious why I agreed to this contest?”

Farley yawned. “Maybe.”

“Because men like you get what they deserve.”

Farley leaned against the doorway and folded his arms. “Do they now?”

“They do indeed. And you were right. I was flirting with you when I first arrived here and asked for directions.”

“My impression from the dinner party was you’re not keen on going out with me.”

“What was I supposed to say with my fiancé sitting right there? How would that have looked if I hadn’t put up a fight?”

“You have a point.”

“I want you to know I’m going to make sure our date is a night you’ll never forget.”

Farley laughed. “And what does Harley think of that?”

“Probably the same thing you think about Harley winning. If he could win that is.”

Farley pushed off the door frame, took a step into her and said, “So, how long have you known old Harley?”

“Almost two years.”

“When did he ask you to marry him?”

“Oh, he didn’t ask me. I told him I wanted a ring.”

“When was that?”

“Right before we moved here.”

“You went out for two years and he never asked you to marry him?”

“What difference does it make who asks whom? Point is we’re engaged.”

Farley held his hand out and gestured towards hers. “May I?”

Mallory smiled coyly and extended her left hand. Farley took it and studied the engagement ring. “My, that is a small diamond.”

Mallory pulled her hand away. “I love it. Harley picked it out.”

“I’ll bet he did. I’ll bet there wasn’t a smaller one to be found.”

“It’s not the size it’s the quality,” Mallory said tersely.

“Maybe it’s both.”

“Valerie doesn’t seem impressed.”

“And why do you say that?”

“Well, she doesn’t live here, now does she.”

Farley crossed his arms. “She will.”

“Under the circumstances I find it peculiar you’d propose such an odd competition. One might think you’re desperate.”

“Desperate for what?”

“Valerie.”

Farley narrowed his eyes. “It’s late. You should go home to your fiancé. We’ve both got a big day tomorrow.”

“Like I said, when you win, I’ll make it a night you’ll never forget.”

MY BOOKS

You can check out my books Chicane and the five installments in my Musicology book series Musicology: Volume One, Baby!, Musicology: Volume Two, Kid!, Musicology: Volume Three, Twist!, Musicology: Volume Four, Sweetie! and Musicology: The Epiquad on Amazon in Kindle and Paperback editions. You can also check out Musicology’s web site at www.musicologyrocks.com and vote for who you think will win Musicology!!!

STREAM OF THE WEEK: THIRTEEN LIVES (2022)-Amazon Prime

Prime Video has just released a fantastic new film. Fueled by a stellar cast and superb direction by veteran Ron Howard this fact-based tension filled story is an absolute must see.

One afternoon after their junior football/soccer match a group of twelve boys decide to go spelunking in the Tham Luang caves before attending the birthday party of one of the boys. Their young coach tells them he will go along to keep them safe. But an unexpected turn in the weather changes everything as monsoon season decides to come early… and fast. Soon the boys’ parents are wondering why they haven’t come home from the party and quickly a rescue party is formed at the park.

World class British cave divers Richard Stanton (Viggo Mortenson) and John Volanthen (Colin Farrell) are called to assist the Navy Seals in locating and rescuing the boys and their coach. But upon discovering their location is a brutal and treacherous 7-8 hour swim a rescue seems bleak. That is until Stanton comes up with the unconventional idea of adding to the crew Richard “Harry” Harris (Joel Edgerton) an Australian cave diver with an unusual skill.

The claustrophobic underwater scenes shot by cinematographer Sayombhu Mukdeeprom are outstanding. And his work, as well as Ron Howard’s should (hopefully) be remembered come Oscar season.