Good afternoon. It is I Gigi the parti poodle here to introduce chapter forty-one of my story Certified Sadistic Accountant. This week my novelist has been trying to help a couple of her relatives who are trapped in that most terrifying level of Dante’s hell, the public school system.
Apparently, public schools have the right to force students to work without pay. In other words, instead of the student taking a class, they have the right to force the student to work as a lacky for said school during a class period as opposed to the student sitting in a classroom learning a subject. They can claim there is no room in any other class during said period. And they have the legal right to do this to cover up their scheduling mishaps.
Instead of allowing the student to take a different class during any given period, the public school system can force a student to work as a lacky in the office instead of allowing them to be enrolled in a class and in return pay them nothing. Because it is during school hours, it can go under the guise of credit robbing the student of hours they could be sitting in class learning a subject. My novelist and I believe public schools should not have this right.
Schools should begin setting up student schedules no later than sixty days before classes begin. And schools should be required to send out schedules to all students attending school no later than fourteen days before the beginning of the school year, allowing the students to be able to alter any mistakes the school district may and likely will make.
After this debacle, we, and I’m sure many of you, are fed up with the incompetence of the bureaucratic American school system, their profane carnal lust for institutions, their abuse of minors, and their complete and utter disregard for logic and intelligence. And with that, here is chapter forty-one of Certified Sadistic Accountant. Dans l’ensemble, vous n’êtes qu’une autre brique dans le mur.
Certified Sadistic Accountant
by
Gigi the parti poodle
Chapter Forty-One
Curtis arrived at the Dupree Tax Agency the following day in his pale green Honda Accord. He killed the engine and headed inside the rear entrance. He was early which meant he was earlier than his usual early arrival. It was supposed to be sunny today and when he gazed out the front window of the agency that appeared to be the case.
Curtis headed into the breakroom and filled the coffee machine with beans. He retrieved a sleeve of coffee cups from the cabinet and stacked them at the coffee station. Then he made himself a cup of joe and headed out to his desk to work on his accounts.
Twenty minutes later Mr. Dupree arrived. He marched over to Curtis and said gruffly, “Cook, a word in my office.”
This was not the usual cheery greeting Curtis was accustomed to receiving from his boss. However, it was not unexpected either. And so, Curtis rose from his chair and headed up the stairs after Mr. Dupree.
“Have a seat,” Mr. Dupree said gesturing to the chair across from him and straightened his sport coat.
“You were supposed to be here yesterday. The police sent an officer around to your place of residence. You knew Fia had been kidnapped and everyone was supposed to be here yesterday so the police could carry out their sting operation. I sent all my employees an email and Sherrif Bob left all my employees a voicemail. Yet you didn’t show up by seven forty-five as you were told. Where were you and why weren’t you here?”
“I was on my way to work when…something unexpected happened,” Curtis replied.
“What happened?”
Curtis knew he had to come up with an explanation and he had to come up with it fast. “I…realized I had made an error on one of the tax forms.”
“An error?”
“Yes. I was driving to work when I realized I had somehow miscalculated something on the Plowman account.”
“That’s one of our largest accounts.”
“Yes, Mr. Dupree it is. I had to go back and check the forms. It was an unusual morning because I was running late and as you know I am never late. So, I turned my car around and started driving back home.”
“Why didn’t you just keep heading for the office and log in from here?”
“I…I don’t know, sir. I guess I panicked.”
“In all the time you’ve worked here I have never known you to make a mistake on any tax form whatsoever. Lance, now that guy is a royal screw up. There aren’t enough erasers in the world to handle his mistakes. But you? Your near flawless.”
“That’s kind of you to say, Mr. Dupree. But I assure you, I’ve made my fair share of mistakes.”
Mr. Dupree kept a steady gaze on Curtis. “Why didn’t you call the office when you realized you’d made a mistake?”
“I meant to. But I got so caught up in trying to locate the error that by the time I should have called in the day was half over. So, I just stayed at my apartment and rechecked all my other accounts.”
“Did you find any more errors?”
“No. Just the one on the Plowman account. And it was a big one. But it’s fixed now, and everything’s okay.”
“Cook, the police were certain those monsters who kidnapped my daughter would return to the agency. They wanted to make sure everyone was on deck and ready by seven forty-five sharp Monday morning. And I’m having a difficult time understanding your behavior.”
“My behavior?”
“You should have been more concerned about my daughter. We needed everyone on deck in and place and you put a dent in Sheriff Bob’s sting operation, and we were unable to catch the kidnapper. Luckily, she happened to escape and stumbled onto the church there at the bottom of the hill. The one that heads up to the high school. They drove her down here and she appears to be unscathed.”
“That’s the important part; Fia is unscathed.”
“No, Cook, that’s the lucky part. I don’t know what her mother and I would have done if she had never come back.”
“Well,” Curtis said attempting to appear as if he were surmising. “I’ve been thinking about this whole strange event, and I wonder if you’ve considered the idea that it could have been an inside job.”
“An inside job?”
“Maybe one of your employees…or possibly a couple of them planned this. Maybe they wanted to get money out you.”
“There was no ransom note, Cook.”
“You’re right…maybe it was revenge.”
“Revenge? Why would they want revenge? I’m just an accountant. I’m just a man who runs a tax agency. I am faithful to my wife, I haven’t committed any crimes, and I’m a member of the Kiwanis for heaven’s sake. I am an upstanding person in this community. Who in the world would want to seek revenge on me?”
“I don’t know, sir. I’m just brainstorming, sir.”
Mr. Dupree rose from his desk and began walking about. “Revenge…revenge…revenge…hmm…I just don’t see it, Cook. Everybody likes me. And besides, Fia said she never got a good look at her kidnapper. Turned out it was just one kidnapper. There’re maniacs out there, Cook. And my Fia was in the hands of them.”
“Sometimes maniacs are not what they seem. Sometimes they’re the people you see every day.”
“Is there something you’re not telling me, Cook?”
MY BOOKS
You can check out my books Chicane and all five installments of the Musicology book series Musicology: Volume One, Baby!, Musicology: Volume Two, Kid!, Musicology: Volume Three, Twist!, Musicology: Volume Four, Sweetie! and Musicology: The Epiquad on Amazon in Kindle and Paperback editions. You can also check out Musicology’s web site at www.musicologyrocks.com and vote for who you think will win Musicology!
STREAM OF THE WEEK: SIDEWAYS (2004)-HULU
It is always a special treat to rewatch a movie that still makes you laugh, still makes you feel and most importantly still makes you think. This well-deserved recipient of the Oscar for Best Adapted Screenplay by Alexander Payne and Jim Taylor, is based on the book of the same name by Rex Picket.. The same screenwriting pair also co-wrote the smart and sardonic adapted script Election based on the novel by Tom Perrotta.
Sideways is a fantastic, funny and poignant story about two former college roommates who are facing middle age. Jack (Thomas Haden Church in a wonderful Oscar nominated supporting actor performance), is an aging pretty-boy actor who is getting married in a week. Miles (Paul Giamatti in yet another brilliant performance who was wrongly snubbed by the Academy here) is a divorced morose middle school English teacher waiting to find out if his novel is finally getting published.
The two men take a trip from Los Angeles to California wine country in lieu of a bachelor party for a week of wine and restaurants. Or at least that is what Miles thinks. But Jack has a different idea in mind. He wants to party it up and get laid during his last week of freedom.
At a restaurant called The Hitching Post, a place Miles frequents whenever he is in town, Jack spots a beautiful waitress named Maya (Virginia Madson in a lovely Oscar nominated performance) and quickly realizes she is smitten with Miles, and likely has been so for some time. Maya is recently divorced and working towards her masters in Botany. Jack encourages Miles to try and hook up with Maya. But Miles still deeply and profoundly misses his wife, fellow wine connoisseur Victoria (Jessica Hecht) and doesn’t think Maya is good enough for him. The two men also meet Maya’s friend, Stephanie (Sandra Oh) a wine pourer at another establishment. Jack begins hitting on Stephanie despite Miles’s reservations. But despite his protests, Miles finds himself helplessly caught up in a chain of spiraling events.
Gigi Catches Air 