Good afternoon. It is Thursday once again and I Gigi the parti poodle am here to introduce chapter nine of my story Power Grid Failure. This was post-Christmas clean up week and it has been most distressing. My novelist has been spending hours cleaning up after the holidays whilst I have been staying out of the way. But it is utterly exhausting watching her. She moves this, she moves that, she puts this away, she puts that away. I think human beings are devoted to organizing things far more than they should be. A poodle’s world is always in order. And if it isn’t I put it into order with far less energy than my human counterparts. If I want to organize my squeaky toys, I tell the Maltese to pick one up and put it there and pick another up and put it over there. And if I need my blanket moved, I bark at my novelist until she moves it where I want it. The point is to delegate. Use your resources. Avoid doing anything yourself except what you most desire. Otherwise, life is no fun. And life should be sparkling with fun except for those you allot to do your work for you. And with that thought here is chapter nine of Power Grid Failure. Bonne année!   

Power Grid Failure

by

Gigi the parti poodle

Chapter Nine

Tiffany and Adams enter the stairwell. Tiffany retrieves a small flashlight from her coat pocket and turns it on before they head down the stairs.

“Smart,” Adams says.

“I use it when I get off my bus,” Tiffany explains. “Otherwise, I’m walking home in the dark and I don’t want to get hit by a car.”

“Makes sense. Is that also why your coat is white?”

“Yes, it is.”

“Even smarter.”

“Yep.”

“What are we going to do if this guy has a weapon?”

“Who says it’s a guy?”

“It’s always a guy. Guys do these things.”

“We don’t even know what we heard. It might just be something that fell.”

“Maybe,” Adams says skeptically.”

They open the door to the lower floor and step inside. Tiffany shines the flashlight around. “Hello,” she calls out. “Is anyone here?”

Adams leans over and whispers, “Are you sure that was a good idea?”

“What?”

“Announcing our presence.”

“Don’t be ridiculous…”

Suddenly, they hear the sound again.

“Hello?” Tiffany says this time with less confidence.

“Let’s head back.”

“We can’t till we find out who or what is down here.”

“We have to…”

“Shh!”

Footsteps. Adams grabs Tiffany’s arm and motions towards the stairwell. Tiffany signals for him to wait. She turns off the flashlight. “Now we head back.”

They pivot and skulk towards the stairwell. The footsteps draw closer. They stop. Adam’s heart is pounding but he doesn’t want Tiffany to know. He does, however, want to move faster. The darkness is a deterrent, but he has the floor plan memorized having fixed plenty of computers deskside throughout the building.

“Let me lead,” he whispers. “I know the floorplan like the back of my hand.”

“Okay.”

Adams leads them towards the exit. Four desks to the left, break, turn left, four more to the right, break, turn right…

“Adams and Tiffany have been gone awhile,” Windy says wringing her hands. “When did they leave?”

“Six-thirty,” Sloan says who’s been counting every minute of Tiffany’s absence.

“It’s seven now,” Martin says looking at his Cartier Ronde watch.

“Six fifty-eight,” Crystal says glancing at her watch.

Martin scowls. “Does that thing on your wrist light up?”

“Yes. It’s a Timex Indiglo.”

“She’s right,” Reynolds says turning his phone around for the others to see. “Set by the atomic clock.”

“I set mine two minutes fast,” Martin lies.

“The point is they’re still down there,” Windy says. “Anything could have happened by now.”

“Maybe they hooked up,” Reynolds says grinning at Sloan.

“Tiffany has more class than that,” Sloan says glaring back.

“True. She didn’t hook up with you.”

“That’s it, janitor boy!” Sloan says and marches up to him.

“I wouldn’t do that if I were you.”

“Yeah, and why’s that?”

“I’ll kick your ass.”

“I was all state, wiseass.”

“You’re an insurance company?”

“Wrestling.”

“I was all state too.”

“In what?”

“Both of you cool your heels,” Martin growls. “My administrative assistant and my deskside tech are missing, and we need to find them.”

“Someone should go check on them,” Windy says.

Suddenly, the stairwell doors burst open, and Adams and Tiffany enter followed by three men dressed in Mountain Man uniforms. The man in the middle who appears to be the leader says, “Well, well. If it isn’t our old buddy Reynolds.”

“Dragontail!” Reynolds says surprised.

MY BOOKS

You can check out my books Chicane and the five installments in my Musicology book series Musicology: Volume One, Baby!, Musicology: Volume Two, Kid!, Musicology: Volume Three, Twist!, Musicology: Volume Four, Sweetie! and Musicology: The Epiquad on Amazon in Kindle and Paperback editions. You can also check out Musicology’s web site at www.musicologyrocks.com and vote for who you think will win Musicology!

STREAM OF THE WEEK: DRIVEWAYS (2019)-SHOWTIME & Freevee

This week’s film is a quiet yet engrossing story about a woman and her young son who are tasked with the job of cleaning out her late older sister’s house. Kathy (Hong Chau) is struggling to make ends meet when she finds out her sister April has passed away and must go clean the residence out and get it ready to put up for sale. Her eight-year-old son Cody (Lucas Jaye), a quiet intellectual boy takes the road trip with her and when they finally arrive, they find out to their horror that April was a hoarder. A retired Korean War veteran Del (Brian Dennehy in one of his last roles) lives next door and when Cody first sees him sitting on his porch, they strike up a short conversation where Del helps Cody turn the water hose on so Cody can get a drink. But Kathy, upon seeing Cody’s wet shirt is quick to let Del know not to bother her son. However, as Kathy and Cody continue to clean the house Cody and Del strike up a friendship that transcends their age difference and brings a newfound joy to both their lives. This is a sleeper of a film and worth the watch especially for the fine performances as well as Andrew Ahn’s lovely direction and Hannah Bos and Paul Thureen’s well penned script.   

Good afternoon. It is I Gigi the parti poodle here to wish you Happy Holidays. It has been a busy week for me. I traveled a bit which is always disturbing. I can’t decide whether to lie quietly on my blanket or to stand up and bark at my driver. The Maltese always curls up and rarely finds the need to move around. But I must see what is going on outside the window. And I must say, I hate lane changes. And I do alert my novelist or whoever is driving the car to this upsetting experience and let them know my displeasure. I don’t understand why one must ever go sideways. The point is to go forwards. Sideways is just wrong on so many levels. I am a poodle, not a crab. And I am rather upset my stocking wasn’t hung up this year. I deserve a stocking to be hung up just as much as anyone and I am taking this up with my novelist. No such disregard for me should ever be exercised again. And if it is, I will personally tear down any stocking which is not mine and ransack the contents within. And with that, here is Chapter Eight of my story Power Grid Failure.   

Power Grid Failure

by

Gigi the parti poodle

Chapter Eight

“I think we should hear from Crystal first,” Reynolds says.

“Who?” Martin says.

“Crystal. She’s one of your employees.”

“Oh, yes. Our technical writer.”

“What do you like to do for fun, Crystal?” Windy asks.

“Well…,” Crystal says not wanting to be part of the conversation. “I guess I like coming to work.”

“Work?”

“I think what Windy is asking,” Reynolds says to Crystal, “or for that matter what all of us would like to know is what you like to do outside of work.”

Crystal looks around at her co-workers and says, “Sometimes I take the bus to the discount movie theatre.”

“Are there any particular types of movies you like to see?”

“Independent films I suppose.”

“So, you’re a cinephile.”

“Well, that’s what’s usually playing there. Sometimes I’ll ride the bus home, sit at my desk, and write about the film I saw.”

“Alright, Reynolds,” Martin says. “You’ve heard the rest of us spill our guts. Now it’s your turn.”

Reynolds stretches out his long arms and legs and folds his hands behind his head. “Let’s see. What do I like to do? What do I like to do…? Well…I like to play the stock market.”

Sloan scoffs. “I’d be surprised if you even had a savings account.”

Reynolds smiles. “I’ve played the stocks since I was in college. Even bought a small house with my earnings.”

“When?”

“A couple years after the housing bubble burst. The property was in foreclosure, so I got a bargain price. Today it’s worth three times what I paid for it.”

“If that’s the case, why don’t you sell it and buy something bigger?”

“Well, see that’s where Crystal and I share something in common. We both like working here. A bigger place would mean moving further out. And I’m young enough to keep working here for a while.”

“Why don’t you apply for a better job?” Adams asks.

“Interesting question,” Reynolds says sitting up. “Probably because no one will hire me for anything other than a janitor.”

“Couldn’t you take the money and go to college?”

“I’ve already graduated from college. I also have a criminal record. My record doesn’t stop me from investing my own money however.”

“You’ll have to give us financial advice sometime.”

“He’s not allowed,” Martin says.  

“What was that?” Tiffany says.

“Sounds like it came from downstairs,” Sloan says.

All heads turn toward the direction of the stairwell.

“Reynolds,” Martin says. “Go down there and check it out.”

Reynolds laughs. “Why should I be the one to check it out?”

“You’re the janitor,” Sloan says. “It’s your job.”

“I’ll go see what it is,” Tiffany says and heads for the stairs.

“No!” Sloan and Adams yell at the same time.

“I’ll go with you,” Reynolds says getting up.

“I’ll go too,” Sloan says.

“You just said it was my job.”

“What if it’s someone who slipped in before the blackout happened?” Crystal says. “What if they’re dangerous?”

“We don’t know if it’s a person who made the sound,” Tiffany says.

“We should all go together,” Windy says. “There’s safety in numbers.”

“It’s too bad we couldn’t just send an AI robot down there,” Adams says.

Sloan scoffs. “Yeah, I think there’s one in the supply room.”

“Someday we’ll revere robots more than people. In fact, in some ways we already do. Like music. There’s hardly any instruments anymore. It’s all electronic. Even the human singing voice is adjusted to how we want it to sound instead of how it really sounds. Soon we won’t want to watch human athletes or human actors or go to human doctors because we’ll be conditioned to believe robots are better at doing the job. And robots don’t eat or sleep or take breaks. They’ll just keep on keeping on and outdo us at every turn until companies don’t hire people anymore. Universities don’t take human students anymore. The concept of human jobs becomes obsolete.”

“You’re right. You do need a night out.”

“I agree with Crystal,” Windy says. “It could be someone dangerous.”

“Like I said before,” Reynolds says, “no one can get in and no one can get out.”

“Maybe it’s a inside job,” Crystal says.

“What do you mean?” Windy asks.

“What if whoever is down there wanted to get locked in?”

“They’d have to know the building goes into lockdown automatically during blackouts,” Reynolds says.

“You knew this building locked down automatically during a blackout,” Sloan says glaring at Reynolds.

“So, you think the white-collar criminal turned janitor who happens to know the building goes into lockdown during a blackout set it up, so someone got inside before the place locked down and plans to commit some sort of a crime.”

Sloan takes a step into Reynolds. “Yeah.”

“I know all about your record, Reynolds,” Martin says. “I’m with Sloan on this one.”

“You don’t think I learned something from my mistakes?” Reynolds says.

“Not a chance.”

“Maybe it’s not some inside job at all,” Tiffany says. “Maybe it’s someone who got trapped in the building just like us.”

“I didn’t see anyone down there when I went to get the elevator drop key,” Reynolds says.

“We don’t trust you,” Sloan says.

Tiffany rolls her eyes. “I’m going down there to find out for sure.”

“I’m going with you.”

“No,” Martin says. “Adams, you go with Tiffany.”

“Yes, sir,” Adams says and he and Tiffany head for the stairwell.

“They might need a hand,” Sloan says following them.

“You stay here,” Martin barks. “I might need a hand.”

MY BOOKS

You can check out my books Chicane and the five installments in my Musicology book series Musicology: Volume One, Baby!, Musicology: Volume Two, Kid!, Musicology: Volume Three, Twist!, Musicology: Volume Four, Sweetie! and Musicology: The Epiquad on Amazon in Kindle and Paperback editions. You can also check out Musicology’s web site at www.musicologyrocks.com and vote for who you think will win Musicology!!!

STREAM OF THE WEEK: THE DROPOUT (2022)-HULU

There have been several outstanding mini-series released in 2022, and this Hulu original is amongst the best. It tells the story of Elizabeth Holms (Golden Globe nominee and Emmy winner Amanda Seyfried in a brilliant performance) a bright and highly ambitious college freshman who after a horrific life changing experience drops out of Stanford to pursue her dream of becoming a CEO. Her product is a blood tests that requires only a couple of drops from your finger as opposed to a full venial draw. Before quitting Stanford, she pitches her idea to Dr. Phyllis Gardner (Laurie Metcalf) who punches all sorts of holes in Elizabeth’s scientific theory.

During her senior year of high school, Elizabeth enrolls in Stanford University’s summer Mandarin immersion program in China, where she meets another student Ramesh “Sunny” Balwani (Naveen Andrews) a thirty-seven-year-old multi-millionaire. After Elizabeth drops out of Stanford University, the two reconnect and began a complex romantic and business relationship. Together they found Theranos, a health technology company. Joining them is chemist Ian Gibbons (Stephen Fry) who after working for them for a few years begins see the conflict between the business and the science.  

Elizabeth’s neighbor and family friend Richard Fuisz (William H. Macy), a successful physician, entrepreneur, and inventor threatens to sue her company over patents. Failing that, he goes on a passionate rampage to ambush Theranos with the help of John Carreyrou (Ebon Moss-Bachrach), a writer from the Wall Street Journal and two young scientists Tyler Schultz (Dylan Minnette) and Erika Cheung (Camryn Mi-young Kim) who, like Gibbons begin to see the truth behind the facade.  

Good afternoon. It is I Gigi the parti poodle here to introduce chapter seven of my story Power Grid Failure. We are experiencing a La Nina in the Pacific Northwest and the temperatures here are lower than usual. This is the second time this year we’ve had snow before Christmas which is uncommon in this region. It is most cold outside, and I have not been able to go for walkies for several days. I have found the best way to exercise under these conditions is to rouse the Maltese and fight him. He is a peaceful sort who would have done well during the sixty’s hippie movement. This of course makes me want to attack him more. I have not done well in attempting this activity and a couple of times have found myself sitting alone in a room for a time-out. I detest sitting alone in a room for a time-out. It is boring and I need to manage and command those around me.

I am ready to fight you now.

Tucker, what are you wearing?

This is my sumo suit.

You look like a miniature balloon at the Macy’s Thanksgiving Day Parade.

I brought you one too.

I am not putting that inane thing on.

If you want to fight me, you must wear the sumo suit.

I am not fighting you wearing a beach ball.

Then I will fight you anyway.

Get away from me! This is ridiculous! Stop! It appears I must tend to the catastrophe at hand. In the meantime, here is chapter seven of Power Grid Failure. Merii Kurisumasu!

Power Grid Failure

by

Gigi the parti poodle

Chapter Seven

“I’ve got them,” Reynolds says as he re-enters the breakroom. He carries large yellow and red handheld flashlights which he sets up around the tables. “Saw them in the maintenance room when I went to get the elevator key.”

“Why, thank you,” Windy chirps. “It definitely adds ambiance.”

“You’re very welcome. Since we’re all going to be spending the night together, we might as well get to know each other on a first name basis. “I’m Reynolds, by the way.”

“I’m Windy.”

“Nice to meet you, Windy.” Reynolds turns to Tiffany. Tiffany eyes him warily, not wanting to share that information with him.

“I know the big executive’s name is Mr. Martin Peak.”

“Watch it, Reynolds,” Martin says. “You’re treading on thin ice.”

“You two know each other?” Sloan says. “Like on a first name basis?”

“We’ve met,” Martin says stiffly.

“How?’

“That’s none of your business.”

Reynolds turns to Sloan. “Do you know her name?” he asks pointing to Crystal.

“She’s our technical writer.”

“And her name is?”

“How should I know?”

“Martin said it earlier.”

“I wasn’t paying attention.”

“Apparently not.” Reynolds turns to Crystal and nods his head at Sloan. “What’s his name?”

Crystal looks at Sloan. “I’m not sure.”

“Maybe you two should introduce yourselves.”

Crystal looks at Sloan. “I’m Crystal.”

Sloan rolls his eyes and says, “Sloan.”

“See,” Reynolds says. “It wasn’t that hard. Let’s recap. I’m Reynolds. The executive there is Martin. You’re Sloan. And you’re Crystal.” Reynolds turns to Adams. “Why don’t you introduce yourself to Blondie?”

“Don’t call me Blondie,” Tiffany says.

“Sorry. Tech Guy, introduce yourself to the blonde.”

“We already know each other,” Tiffany says, “because Adams fixes my computer sometimes. And I know Windy from HR.”

“Yeah, but do you know Sloan?”

“I know he works here.”

“Yeah, but do you know his name?”

“No, I don’t know his name.”

“But I’ll bet he knows yours.”

“I know a way we could all get to know each other better,” Windy says.

“This is stupid,” Sloan says.

“No, it isn’t. It’s a social interaction exercise. We’ll go around the room and each of us will share an activity we enjoy doing.”

“What difference does it make?” Martin says. “We’ll all go back to our regular scheduled lives tomorrow.”

“Mr. Peak,” Tiffany says. “I think it’s a good idea. I know you could share some interesting things you do over the weekends.”

“I don’t want to share, and I definitely don’t want to go first.”

“But Martin,” Windy says. “You’re the leader of the group. It’s imperative you go first.”

“Windy, I put you in charge of social interaction this monstrous evening. You should be the one to go first.”

“Martin, you need to lead the group. I can’t give them the same sense of morale you can.”

“Fine! I like to build things.”

“Oh, that sounds fascinating! What do you build?”

“I built the first house my wife and I lived in.”

“Really?”

“Contractors screw you. I mean you’re stuck hiring guys like electricians and plumbers and roofers. But generally, I did most of the work myself. It’s a heck of a lot cheaper that way.”

“I’d have never pegged you for a guy who liked to get his hands dirty,” Reynolds says.

“Well, I am. And just because I’m older don’t think I won’t do it again. I have a little piece of property on the other side of the mountains I’m thinking of breaking ground on.”

“Why, Martin,” Windy says. “I never knew that.”

“Now you do. You’re turn.”

“Well,” Windy says delighted to be the center of attention, “I love throwing dinner parties. I know it seems like an archaic idea but it’s much more fun than sitting around at night watching those dreadful streamers. They’re so mind numbing. My husband just finished watching one of those lunatic criminals on tape going on and on about how he did this to this person and that to that person and how much smarter he was than the police. After a while those documentaries all sound the same. I think if some of those maniacs would have gone to a dinner party occasionally and made some real friends, they wouldn’t have committed those horrible crimes.

“Anyway, I love throwing dinner parties. They are so much fun. The hor d’oeuvres are my favorite part. Those itty-bitty gastronomical bursts of joy that explode in your mouth are pure heaven.”

“I think it’s your turn, Tiffany,” Martin says.

“Okay,” Tiffany says. “Well…I really like fashion. I love all the imagination that goes into it. I thought that 3-D flower stuff they did a couple of years back where they sewed the middle of the blossom to the clothing but left the petals unattached was super cool. I totally loved how they popped out free of constraint.

“I always wanted to start my own fashion label. I’d like to call it Tiffany’s, but I can’t because, like duh, Tiffany’s. So, I was thinking something like Choquant. You know, a little flirty but kind of, I don’t know, suave.”

“Did you study fashion in college?” Reynolds asks.

“No, I got my degree in sociology. I’m saving money to go to design school.”

“Marvelous!” Windy says. “Sloan, it’s your turn.”

“I already know what Sloan likes,” Tiffany says. “Stalking.”

“I’m not a stalker,” Sloan says.

“What do you mean you’re not a stalker? You stalk me every night!”

“Is that true?” Windy asks Tiffany. “Because if it is I need you to come to my office tomorrow and file a report.”

“I am not a stalker,” Sloan says. “I’m just an accountant!”

“What do you like to do besides stalking, Sloan?” Windy asks.

Sloan rolls his eyes. “I like to read. I like to go to the library and check out a stack of books.”

“What type of books?” Martin asks.

“I always enjoy a good finance book, but I’ve been trying to branch out lately and read action novels.”

“Adams,” Windy says. “What do you do for fun?”

“Oh, gaming for sure,” Adams says.

“That’s obvious,” Sloan says rolling his eyes.

“What’s wrong with gaming?”

“Nothing. It’s just predictable you’re a gamer.”

“Well, it’s not the only thing I’m into. And I’ll bet you’ve done your fair share of gaming.”

“Some.”

“Do you like first person shooter games, RPG’s, sandbox, RTS?”

“I like Grand Theft Auto.”

“Oh…of course, you do.”

“Is that some sort of dis on my gaming taste?”

“No. I just thought you might have brought something interesting to the table.”

“Like Stalker Guy 3000,” Tiffany says.

“Honestly, Tiffany,” Sloan says turning towards her. “You need to stop taking this whole stalking thing personally.”

“You’re stalking me. So, yeah, I take that personally.”

“Well, from what I’ve found out about you, you’re painfully predictable.”

“What do you mean?”

“I could stop following you for an entire week and know exactly where you were at any given time.”

“That’s not true.”

“Do you have any idea how many young women want to be a fashion designer? Not to mention what a filthy business it is. Do you even have an inkling of how many tons of clothing get tossed into the garbage each year? Even Goodwill and the Salvation Army can’t keep up with fashion’s fickleness. Workers at those places walk down the clothing aisles every week checking labels and thinning out what didn’t sell. They take that unwanted fashion and dump it into a gigantic pile that gets a second life as rags guys use to clean their cars.”

Tiffany looks at him with doleful eyes. “You’re a real sweetheart. I wouldn’t talk if I were you. Sitting at your desk every day pushing numbers around for some…”

“Alright,” Windy says. “I think this conversation has gone off on a tangent. This is supposed to be an exercise to help us get to know one another, not tear each other down. Not to mention the focus was supposed to be on Adams.”

“Yeah,” Reynolds says. “You already had your turn, Sloan, so shut up.”

“Stay out of this,” Sloan snaps back. “You’re a custodian. Have you ever even done a team building exercise before?”

“Nobody wants you telling them their hobby is stupid. They just want to talk about what makes them happy. So, do us a favor, Sloan. Shut up and let Adams talk about how video games get his rocks off.”

“Well, I wouldn’t say they get my rocks off,” Adams said. “I just really dig playing them.”

“Mr. Reynolds,” Windy said. “Since you’ve been holding the floor, why don’t you share what your favorite past time is.”

Reynolds leans back in his chair, folds his hands and smiles.

MY BOOKS

You can check out my books Chicane and the five installments of my Musicology book series Musicology: Volume One, Baby!, Musicology: Volume Two, Kid!, Musicology: Volume Three, Twist!, Musicology: Volume Four, Sweetie! and Musicology: The Epiquad on Amazon in Kindle and Paperback editions. You can also check out Musicology’s web site at www.musicologyrocks.com and vote for who you think will win Musicology!!!

STREAM OF THE WEEK: THE BANSHEES OF INISHERIN (2022)-HBO Max

This week’s pick is nominated for eight Golden Globes including Best Picture Musical/Comedy. Set in Ireland in 1923 right as the Irish Civil war is ending, the story is about two longtime friends Pádraic Súilleabháin (Golden Globe Nominee for Best Actor in a Comedy and New York Film Critic’s Best Actor recipient Colin Farrell) and Colm Doherty (Golden Globe Nominee for Best Supporting Actor Brendan Gleeson). One day violinist Colm decides he no longer wants to be friends with Pádraic which throws Pádraic for a loop. Pádraic, a simple man, discusses his befuddlement with his sister Siobhán Súilleabháin (Golden Globe Nominee for Best Supporting Actress Kerry Condon) the most intelligent person on their island, and young Dominic Kearney (Golden Globe Nominee for Best Supporting Actor Barry Keoghan) the least intelligent person on their island. When Colm tells Pádraic to stop bothering him and leave him alone or he will cut off one of his own fingers, Pádraic vows to mend their friendship by any means possible.

The film was written and directed by the very talented Martin McDonagh (Golden Globe Nominee for Best Screenplay and Best Director) known for his masterpiece Three Billboards Outside Ebbing Missouri for which he rightly won the Golden Globe for Best Screenplay and most definitely should have won the Oscar as well. The Banshees of Inisherin is not quite as good as that one, but that’s a very high bar and McDonagh should take most of this year’s writing awards just the same. Please bear in mind though this is a dark comedy, with the emphasis on dark, and it has a haunting quality that stays with the viewer long after the film is finished. The movie is also nominated for Best Score for Carter Burwell’s clever soundtrack.  

Good afternoon. It is I Gigi the parti poodle here to introduce chapter six of my story Power Grid Failure. The holidays are here and with them comes film awards season. The Golden Globe nominations came out this week and we are anxious to find out who will take home the statues. My novelist and I are excited to watch some of the releases which are available on streaming in the coming weeks. I love to cozy up with the Maltese as my footstool and take in a great story. Occasionally, I will wear a silk robe and sip Starbuck’s Cocoa when I partake of such activities but that is a subject for another day. Until then, here is Chapter Six of Power Grid Failure. Joyeux Noël!

Power Grid Failure

by

Gigi the parti poodle

Chapter Six

Windy returns from her office carrying a pair of sheers. “Here you go,” she says cheerily handing them to Adams.

“These are great,” Adams says taking them and cutting the end of the pen.

“This better work,” Sloan says. “I’m fiending for food.”

“What if it doesn’t?” Crystal asks.

“What do you mean?”

“What if the food doesn’t satiate you?”

“I’ll turn into a big harry monster.”

“Like a Muppet?”

“Are you plugged in? It’s an expression.”

“Oh.”

Sloan turns to Tiffany and mouths “Wow”.

Adams cuts the back of the pen into four sections. He slides the cut end into the lock with his right hand and holds it. He grabs the lock with his left hand and shakes it. “That’s it!” he says as the “wheel of death” pops open.

“Hand me that turkey sandwich on the hoagie roll,” Sloan says.

“Now, wait a minute,” Martin says. “We are going to ration this out properly in an orderly manner. Windy, you are the most socially adept person here. I say you do the rationing.”

“Why thank you, Martin!” Windy says. “This is going to be fun.”

“How does that transfer into her overseeing food?” Sloan asks. “And what makes you think Windy is the most socially adept person here anyway?”

“You definitely aren’t,” Tiffany says.

Sloan looks at her shocked. “What do you mean?”

“You’re a jerk.”

“I’m not…I’m hungry and…under duress. And I’m worried about my poodle.”

“That’s not an excuse.”

“Windy,” Martin says. “Please commence.”

“Well, alright,” Windy says. “It looks like the machine is due for restocking. I thought they would have done it Friday…”

“They couldn’t,” Tiffany says. “The guy said all the vendors were having their annual holiday dinner party.”

“Oh, that’s right! Well…it looks like we have four sandwiches…some red delicious apples…a few hummus and pretzel packs and cracker and carrot packs…four milk cartons…no, wait…there’s a chocolate one as well so five milk cartons all together.”

“Thank you, Windy,” Martin says. “How shall we divide this?”

“I’m a vegetarian,” Tiffany says. “So, I would be happy with the hummus and pretzel pack and an apple.”

“Fabulous,” Windy says. “Is anyone else a vegetarian?”

“Are you kidding?” Sloan says. “I’m halfway to a carnivore.”

“That goes without saying,” Tiffany mumbles.

“Well,” Windy continues. “We have a roast beef sandwich, a turkey sandwich, a ham sandwich and a vegan meat sandwich.”

“Vegan meat,” Sloan scoffs. “What a complete waste of bread.”

“Perhaps you would like the roast beef?” Windy says.

“Exactly.”

“No,” Martin says. “He needs to find out if anyone else has a reason they can’t eat the chicken or pork.”

“I can’t eat pork,” Adams says.

“Why?”

“I don’t like it.”

“Anybody else?” Windy says.

Sloan really wants the roast beef sandwich. But he knows he’d seriously lose points with Tiffany if he takes it. “I’ll have the pork,” Sloan says. “Give Tech Guy here the roast beef.”

“Hold your horses there, pal,” Reynolds says. “I’m a carnivore too and I say I have just as much right to stake claim to that roast beef and ham as you do.”

“But you’re the janitor,” Adams says. “Don’t janitors always bring their own lunch?”

“Not necessarily. In fact, that burger place on the corner is open until one and I had planned to grab a bite from there tonight.”

“How much does a trip to that food cart cost you on average?” Sloan asks.

“I usually get the Mountain Meal.”

“What does that consist of?”

“A Mountain Burger, Fourteener Fries and a large Stardust Soda.”

“Do you buy dessert?”

“Sometimes I’ll get one of those Blueberry Mountain Pocket Pies.”

“Okay, so all together with tax what does that set you back?”

“What difference does any of this make?” Crystal asks.

“What do you mean, what difference does it make?” Sloan says. “It makes an enormous difference. Do you have a Mountain Man Meal Card, Reynolds?”

“Of course, I have a Mountain Man Meal Card,” Reynolds says. Everyone in their right mind has a Mountain Man Meal Card!”

“What is the importance of having a Mountain Man Meal Card?”

“Every eleventh Mountain Man Meal is free. And I mean a burger, fries, and a shake!”

“Look,” Martin says. “No one can get a Mountain Man Meal tonight. Now, let’s finish picking out what everyone wants so we can all eat.”

MY BOOKS

You can check out my books Chicane and the five installments of my Musicology book series Musicology: Volume One, Baby!, Musicology: Volume Two, Kid!, Musicology: Volume Three, Twist!, Musicology: Volume Four, Sweetie! and Musicology: The Epiquad on Amazon in Kindle and Paperback editions. You can also check out Musicology’s web site at www.musicologyrocks.com and vote for who you think will win Musicology!!!

STREAM OF THE WEEK: EVERYTHING EVERYWHERE ALL AT ONCE (2022)-SHOWTIME

The Golden Globe nominations came out this week and to kick off the awards season I thought I would offer up some of the nominees that are available on streaming. Two weeks ago, I talked about the superb miniseries Dahmer–Monster: The Jeffery Dahmer Story which received four Golden Globe nominations including one for Evan Peters for his outstanding performance in the title role. This week I am going to focus on a film like none I have ever seen before. This is a fast paced, complex multi-verse story about a frustrated overworked middle-aged woman named Evelyn Wang (Michelle Yeoh) who runs a laundry mat with her mild-mannered husband Waymond Wang (Ke Huy Quan). They have a grown daughter named Joy (Stephanie Hsu) who Evelyn struggles to understand. And addiding additional stress to their lives is Joy’s grandfather Gong Gong (James Hong) who lives with the Wangs.

The laundry mat is being audited by IRS officer Deirdre Beaubeirdre (Jamie Lee Curtis) a frumpy grouchy woman who scrutinizes every detail about the Wang’s business. When the Wangs arrive at the IRS office for the audit, something unexpected occurs: Evelyn is visited by a different Waymond from another universe of many Evelyn could have lived.

This is a challenging, complex script that is a lot of fun albeit at times a little frenetic and not perhaps as deep as other unique scripts like Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind, The Truman Show, Memento or Donnie Darko but well worth the watch for its exploration of a subject rarely shown in film. The movie is nominated for six Golden Globes including Best Picture (Musical or Comedy), Best Actress (Musical or Comedy) for Michelle Yeoh, Best Supporting Actor for Ke Huy Quan, Best Supporting Actress for Jamie Lee Curtis, and Best Director and Best Script for the team of Daniel Kwan and Daniel Scheinert.   

Good afternoon. Gigi the parti poodle here once again to introduce chapter five of my story Power Grid Failure. Today I am in desperate need of finding something to give my novelist for her birthday. I asked her what she wanted, and she told me my company. That is a lovely thing for her to say but I know she wants a gift. Something tangible. Humans are so difficult to get presents for. The Maltese is presenting her with a still wrapped Lindor ball he found behind the couch, but I know I must give her something better. I cannot be outdone by the Maltese. I did find a quarter out on the sidewalk during one of our walks and I believe if I were to polish it up a bit it might do. Humans like shiny things, do they not. It would be so much easier if I could just get approved for a credit card. And start a Roth IRA. And purchase stock in Chewy or as those in finance call it, CHWY. Anyway, here is chapter five of Power Grid Failure. Buon Natale!

Power Grid Failure

by

Gigi the parti poodle

Chapter Five

“Where do you follow me to?” Tiffany asks Sloan.

“I…well…we ride the same bus,” Sloan says.

“That can’t be right,” Windy says. “Sloan lives on the Eastside and Tiffany lives near the University.”

As soon as she says it, Windy realizes she’s blurted out more information than the company wanted her sharing with employees.

“Really?” Reynolds says amused. “I’ll bet you know a lot of things about our little motley crew. What about tech guy here? What can you tell me about him?”

Windy looks at Adams. “He’s part of our technology department.”

“And?”

“I’m HR. It’s my job to keep employees’ information private.”

“What about when you get home? What about when you go out with the girls? Do you keep the employees’ information private then?”

“Absolutely.”

“How about after you’ve ordered one of those tropical drinks with a chunk of pineapple and a maraschino cherry skewered with a paper umbrella?”

A now uncomfortable Windy says, “I keep this company’s employee information under lock and key.”

“Except when you go over to Mr. Peak’s house for a summer barbeque.”

“What are you talking about?”

“So, you didn’t tell Mr. Peak I had a criminal record?”

“Windy is the best HR representative this company has ever had,” Mr. Peak says suddenly feeling uncomfortable.

“That may be, but she still told you about my record.”

“What did you do?” Crystal asks.

All eyes turn and look at her.

Reynolds furrows his brow and says, “Let’s go get that vending machine open.”

The seven workers head into the breakroom where the Circle of Death stands still and unlit.

“How do you propose we go about breaking in?” Martin asks Reynolds.

“Brute force,” Reynolds says. “I could take a hammer and break each individual window.”

“I have a better idea,” Adams says.

“Okay, hot shot. What’s your plan?”

“Well, my friends and I use to have this tubular lock pick you can get at hardware stores. The picks have seven, eight and ten pick variations. We’d stick them into the lock and pop! The machine would open.”

“And then you’d steal the money.”

“No, we never stole the money out of the machines. That would be a crime.”

“Then why did you break into them?”

“Just to see if we could do it. But it will only work if the machine has a tubular lock.”

“So, you have these picks in your desk drawer then?”

“No, they’re back at my apartment.”

“Great,” Martin says. “Thanks for that. Reynolds, get the hammer.”

“No, wait. There’s another way. You can pop the lock using a pen instead. Provided it’s the right size to fit the lock. I think this is an old enough machine we can pop the lock.”

“Everyone head to your desks and bring this man back your pens,” Martin says.

“Guess you’re not the sharpest crayon in the box after all are you, Reynolds,” Sloan snarks.

Reynolds scoffs as he watches everyone except Adams leave the breakroom. “I’m a janitor,” he tells Adams. “I don’t have any pens.”

“That’s a brilliant idea Adams has,” Tiffany says to Sloan as they head to their desks.

Sloan scoffs and says, “It’s just some old college trick he and his nerd buddies came up with because they couldn’t get dates.”

“I think Adams is cute enough to get dates.”

“Cute? You think that dweeb is cute? He’s a creepy troll who crawls under desks.”

“At least he doesn’t stalk me.”

“Now, look,” Sloan says stopping. “This whole thing that weird janitor was talking about is totally overblown.”

“How far do you follow me out every night?”

“We both head in the same direction to the bus tunnel and catch our rides.”

“I’ve seen you on my bus.”

“On your bus?”

“Windy said you live on the Eastside. Why would you get on my bus which never goes to the Eastside if you live on the Eastside?”

“I…we need to find those pens,” Sloan says then scurries over to his desk.

Crystal rifles through the pens in her large coffee mug. The mug is robin’s egg blue with bright pink flamingos all over it. Despite its appealing appearance it looks out of place in the dreary business building.

Crystal has several types of pens for her work. She’s especially fond of worker pens from Germany that flow smoothly when she writes. But she keeps a stash of ordinary Bic ballpoint pens. She’s certain the type of pen Adams needs to open the lock is not a high-tech one. Grabbing her writing instruments, she hurries back to the breakroom.

Windy enters the breakroom with a bouquet of pens in a kaleidoscope of colors. Mr. Peak who rarely uses pens these days and instead tasks Tiffany with typing texts and emails knows he cannot come back emptyhanded. He opens the top drawer of his desk, scans what he has and grabs a couple stray pens before heading to the break room.

“Alright,” Adams says after everyone returns. “Let’s see what we’ve got. Everyone put your pens on the table here.”

All the employees lay out their pen collections on the breakroom table. Adams starts rummaging through them.

“If you know how to open a vending machine with a pen,” Crystal says, “don’t you keep the perfect sized pen in your own desk drawer?”

“I used to,” Adams says, “but since the company provides us pens, I figured I’d save money and took mine home.”

“Well, that sucks,” Sloan says.

“Yeah. The company pens are too thick to fit the lock and by looking at the table here, most of you had the same idea.”

“But they aren’t all company pens,” Martin says. Isn’t there something here that will work?”

Adams puts his hands on his hips. “Maybe this one,” he says picking up Crystal’s Bic disposable ball point pen with a removable cap. “I’m going to have to cut the head off and take out the ink tube. Is that okay?”

“It doesn’t mean anything to me,” Crystal says.

“Okay, good. I need a sharp pair of scissors.”

“I have some in my office,” Windy says heading out.

“What if this doesn’t work,” Sloan says.

“Well,” Adams says, “I guess we’re going to have to find out.”

MY BOOKS

You can check out my books Chicane and the five installments of my Musicology book series Musicology: Volume One, Baby!, Musicology: Volume Two, Kid!, Musicology: Volume Three, Twist!, Musicology: Volume Four, Sweetie! and Musicology: The Epiquad on Amazon in Kindle and Paperback editions. You can also check out Musicology’s web site at www.musicologyrocks.com and vote for who you think will win Musicology!!!

STREAM OF THE WEEK: SLALOM (2020)-Showtime

A few weeks back, I recommended the 1988 film The Accused over Luckiest Girl Alive. This week I thought I’d recommend another movie dealing with similar subject matter, a tense intimate French film called Slalom. Written by Charlène Favier and Marie Talon and directed by Favier, the story is set in an elite ski club in the French Alps. Fifteen-year-old Lyz (Noée Abita in a luminous performance), a naturally talented skier who has been accepted to the prestigious ski club. Her mother Catherine (Muriel Combeau) who doesn’t truly understand her daughter’s passion for the sport has taken a job and cannot stay or visit the club often leaving Lyz on her own. Though not as experienced a skier as the other young hopefuls, Lyz is tenacious and hard working. This does not go unnoticed by the club’s lead coach Fred (Jérémie Renier) a charismatic but predatory man in his early forties who slowly grooms Lyz to be as much a champion like he once was as a victim. The film is reminiscent of the US Gymnastic team scandal touching on not only the physical and mental pressure put on young star athletes by temperamental coaches but also the devastation of sexual misconduct. I also found this article written by a former swimmer who in the 1960’s experienced firsthand the torture of narcissistic coaches: I was a teenage swimmer. It took me decades to admit my coach was abusive

Good afternoon. It is I Gigi the parti poodle here to introduce chapter four of my story Power Grid Failure. It has been a snowy couple of days here. Snow always confuses me when I have to go out in it. I cannot smell things in the manner I am used to and the ground is cold and wet. Today it was frozen snow so it was slippery too. I am rather fond of running in it when it is powdery but this was an all around miserable experience. I will say I had a rather pleasant Black Friday weekend. I am not allowed to have a credit card or a debit card for that matter being a poodle and all though this lucky one did. Someday I will find a loophole and go on a grand shopping spree. My novelist may balk at the idea. But I think I would be excellent with credit. I would pay off my bill every month. I would only shop for what I needed at All the Best, Sellwood, Chewy, PetCo, PetSmart, and Tiffany’s. I am rather frugal you see. And now here is chapter four of Power Grid Failure. Happy Holidays!

Power Grid Failure

by

Gigi the parti poodle

Chapter Four

“Okay,” Reynolds says returning to the elevators. “I’m going to stick this drop elevator key into that hole in the upper right hand part of the door there. You know, the one that looks like the circumference of a small dowl.”

“Oh, I see it,” Tiffany says.

“I never knew that was what it was for,” Adams says.

“Yeah, that’s what it’s for,” Reynolds says. “Okay then, I’m going to turn it and this knuckle thing is going to drop at a forty-five degree angle and disengage the door on the other side. Then we can spread these doors apart.”

“We?” Sloan says.

“The elevator drop key will stop the mechanism inside and cause the doors to open. Best part is it sounds like the car didn’t go anywhere so they should be able to just walk out. You okay in there, Windy?”

“Oh, yes,” Windy replies. “Marty and I are okay.”

“Don’t call me Marty,” Martin growls.

“It’s just dark,” Windy tells Reynolds. “Very dark.”

“Well, it’s pretty dark out here too,” Reynolds says. “I mean we’ve got windows all around so that helps. And I am wearing a headlamp so I can see. So, we have some light…how you doing, Mr. Peak?”

“I’d be a heck of a lot better if you would just get us out of here,” Martin growls.

Reynolds turns to Crystal and mouths, “Grouch.” Crystal furrows her brow and attempts to smile.

“Okay, well, lets give this a go.”

Reynolds reaches up and sticks the elevator drop key into the hole on the top front of the right-hand door. He turns the key clockwise and everyone hears a click. The doors come apart and Mr. Peak and Windy hurry out.

“Oh, my goodness,” Windy says with a sheepish smile. “I thought Martin and I were going to be stuck in there for days.” Then she looks at Reynolds and says, “Thank you very much. It’s good to know we have custodial workers on staff who are also trained in maintanance.

“Well, I’m the only custodian here who’s trained in maintanance so…”

“I will start encouraging the hiring of more workers with your skill set.”

Reynolds smiles, turns to Crystal and winks. Crystal gets a perplexed look on her face. 

“Alright,” Martin says straightening his jacket and assuming the role of comander. “Let’s make sure this is everyone: Windy, Tiffany, Sloan, Adams, Crystal and…Reynolds.” He says Reynolds name with distane.

“The situation is,” Reynolds says, “that the doors in the building are locked and no one can get in or out. It’s mostly so no one can get in and loot the place.”

“Great,” Sloan says. “I have a desperate poodle waiting for me at home you know. She’s utterly neurotic.”

“She’ll be fine,” Windy says. “Poodles are bright dogs. She’ll find a way to get through the night without you.”

“Lucky poodle,” Crystal mutters.

“So, it looks like we’re all in this together until they get the power back on,” Martin says.

“I’m getting hungry,” Tiffany says.

“It’s only six-fifteen.”

“I only had yogurt for lunch.”

“The cafeteria is closed so we’ll have to come up with a different idea.”

“The wheel of death,” Reynolds says.

“The what?” Sloan says.

“That cylindrical carousel thing in the breakroom with all the sandwiches and mini pizzas and Hot Pockets.”

“You call that thing the “wheel of death”?”

“Everything in it is garbage.”

“Well I can’t argue that.”

“But it runs on electricity,” Crystal says.

“True. But if we break the sliding windows we could get the food out.”

“I am not eating some half-thawed pizza from a vending machine,” Sloan says.

“Well, it’s either we eat something lousy or eat nothing and starve,” Reynolds says. “There’s not a lot of options here and I for one would like sustanance.”

“I think the gigantic elephand in the room,” Martin says, “is we’re not taking into consideration how much this vending machine costs if we break it.”

“But almost no one buys anything from it,” Sloan says.

“That’s not the point,” Reynolds says. “The point is we need to eat and that machine has food. If we don’t find a way to get it open we’re all going to be miserable.”

“I am feeling a bit peckish myself,” Windy says.

“How exactly are we going to get into that machine,” Tiffany asks. “How to you intend to break the windows?”

“I am willing to bet our janitor/maintanance friend here has a marvelous idea.”

“Since we’re all going to be spending the night together,” Reynolds says, “before we break the machine open and break bread we should get to know each other’s names. I’m Reynolds, by the way.”

Reynolds looks at Tiffany who looks back at him with wide eyes not really wanting to share that information.

“And,” Reynolds says continuing, “I know the big executive’s name here is Mr. Martin Peak. He seems to know all your names but I don’t.”

“Watch it, Reynolds,” Martin says. “You’re treading on thin ice.”

“You two know each other,” Sloan says surprised. “Like on a first name basis?”

“We’ve met,” Martin says stiffly.

“How?”

“That’s none of your business.”

Reynolds turns to Tiffany. “So, who do you know here?”

“I know Mr. Peak,” Tiffany replies.

“What’s this guy’s name?” he asks pointing at Sloan.

“Sloan.”

“How do you know that?”

“He’s our accountant.”

“What else do you know about him?”

“Nothing really.”

“That’s interesting because I’ll bet he knows a few things about you.”

Tiffany looks at Stone then back at Reynolds. “What do you mean exactly?”

“Get to the point,” Sloan says, red rising in his face.

“The point is,” Reynolds says to Tiffany, “Sloan here waits for you to leave every night and follows you out.”

“You follow me out?” Tiffany says to Sloan.

“Like clockwork,” Reynolds says.

“Everyone leaves around the same time,” Sloan snaps.

“He could have left earlier this evening,” Reynolds says. “But he saw tech guy here fixing your computer so he sat back down and waited until you got up to go. Then he followed you out.”

MY BOOKS

You can check out my books Chicane and the five installments of my Musicology book series Musicology: Volume One, Baby!, Musicology: Volume Two, Kid!, Musicology: Volume Three, Twist!, Musicology: Volume Four, Sweetie! and Musicology: The Epiquad on Amazon in Kindle and Paperback editions. You can also check out Musicology’s web site at www.musicologyrocks.com and vote for who you think will win Musicology!!!

STREAM OF THE WEEK: DAHMER-MONSTER: THE JEFFERY DAHMER STORY-NETFLIX

This week’s pick is one of the best pieces of filmmaking of 2022. Harrowing, tense and unflinching, this ten-episode Netflix miniseries is an absolute must see. It tells the story of infamous serial killer Jeffery Dahmer (Even Peters in a brilliant career best performance) from his troubled childhood and teenage years to his chilling metamorphosis into one of the most horrific serial killers in American history. Dahmer had a 145 IQ, was diagnosed with borderline personality disorder, schizotypal personality disorder, and psychosis. There is a likelihood he was a psychopath but because FMRI technology was not used on him, nor was he given a genetic test for alleles and his brain was cremated after a civil trial between his parents where his father won the case so that any postmortem testing that might be available in the future cannot be done, we will never know for sure. It is one of the only times in the entire series where Jefferey’s mother is shown to be correct.    

Jefferey’s mother Joyce Dahmer (Penelope Ann Miller) suffered from severe mental illness. His father Lionel Dahmer (fantastically played by Richard Jenkins) was an analytical chemist. A genetic recipe for disaster although their second son turned out normal. His father taught Jeffery at an early age to dissect roadkill which he did in the hopes that his son would share the same love of science he did. But unfortunately, it became a morbid fascination for Jefferey. Jefferey also became an alcoholic (which is common with people with HSS, one of the six alleles associated with psychopathy) and would drink alcohol openly in his high school classes. After flunking out of college because of his excessive drinking his father forced him to join the military and Jeffery’s drinking got him dishonorably discharged from there as well. Jeffery killed his first victim Steven Mark Hicks (Cameron Cowperthwaite), a young man looking for a ride to a Sweetwater concert, three weeks after his high school graduation. At the time, Dahmer’s father had left the family for his new wife Shari Dahmer (Molly Ringwald) and his mother took Jeffery’s younger brother and went off to chase UFOs leaving Jeffery in the house alone.

After his son’s dishonorable discharge, Lionel, frustrated and at a loss as to what to do sent Jeffery to move in with his grandmother Catherine Dahmer (Michael Learned), the only member of the family Jeffery seemed to show affection for. She was a Christian woman who tried to help her grandson find faith. Unfortunately, Dahmer ended up picking up men in bars and murdering them in her basement instead.

After moving out of his grandmother’s house Dahmer took up residence at Oxford Apartments where a brave and tenacious tenant named Glenda Cleveland (wonderfully played by Niecy Nash) starts hearing disturbing noises and smelling vile odors at the apartment building. Glenda begins a long and exhaustive journey repeatedly calling and reporting to the police trying to get them to investigate the odd happenings she keeps witnessing involving Jefferey, including trying to save fourteen-year-old Somsack Sinthasomphone (Braydon Maniago) from his impending doom.

One of the most fascinating facts of Dahmer’s life that is shown in the series was that when he was in prison, he chose to get baptized. Oddly the day of his baptism occurred on the same day as John Wayne Gacy was euthanized and a solar eclipse occurred.

Good afternoon and Happy Thanksgiving! It is I Gigi the parti poodle here to introduce the third chapter of my story Power Grid Failure. This week the person who is known as Him is cooking Thanksgiving dinner.

Yes. We are having Vick’s VapoRub Turkey.

Yes, we are having a lovely…what?

We are having Vick’s VapoRub Turkey for Thanksgiving dinner. I am very excited.

No, you insipid Maltese. That is most definitely not what we are having for Thanksgiving dinner.

It is this year’s hottest recipe. I saw it on Tik Tok.

Are you mad?!

No. I rubbed Vick’s VapoRub all over the turkey early this morning.

You what?!

Him is just about to put it in the oven. I can smell the delicious fumes from here. I am breathing very, very well.

We’ve got to wash it off! How…why…I don’t even what to know! Hurry! Good grief! How am I supposed to enjoy a wonderful meal and watch A Charlie Brown Thanksgiving now?! I must rush off but before I go here is chapter three of Power Grid Failure. Adieu!

Power Grid Failure

by

Gigi the parti poodle

Chapter Three

“Do you think we’re trapped in here?” Windy asks Martin as they stand inside the dark unmoving elevator car.

“Try the emergency button again,” Martin says.

Windy tries pushing the large red button for the fifth time. “It’s hopeless. We’re stuck in here, Marty.”

“Don’t call me Marty. Only my wife calls me Marty and I hate it.”

“I’m sorry, but I don’t see a way out of here.”

“We’ll do like they do in the movies. I’ll open the ceiling, climb up on top and look around.”

“Don’t people end up falling that way?”

“Only bad guys. I’m a good guy.”

“I’m not sure that makes sense…”

“Of course, it makes sense. I’ll get up there and survey the situation.”

“Honestly, Martin. You’re afraid of heights.”

“Where did you get that idea?”

“It’s in your files.”

“You went looking through my personal files?”

“I’m an HR representative. It’s my job.”

“Just get ready to hoist me up, will you?”

“I genuinely don’t believe this will work.”

Mr. Peak takes off his wool blazer and loosens his tie. “Okay, now make a step with your hands like this,” he demonstrates lacing the fingers of his hands together. “I’m going to put my foot right there and hoist myself up to the ceiling, shove it aside and pull myself up.”

“What if your weight breaks the cables and we go plummeting to our death?”

“Good grief, we’re not going to plumet to our deaths, Windy. I’m going to have a look around and see if I can find a way to get us out.”

“Do you think you’ll be able to see?”

“Of course, I’ll be able to see.”

“But there’s no light in here. What if there’s no light out there?”

“The emergency lights should be switched on by now.”

Windy shakes her head and hums skeptically. “I will help you do this, Martin. But after you’re up there, I’m going to bang on the doors to see if anyone can hear us.”

Martin sighs and shakes his head. “Fine. Just help me up.”

Windy attempts to get as wide a stance as she can in her restrictive pencil skirt. She bends her knees for support and Martin puts his right foot on her hands and pushes with his left. He reaches for the ceiling and suddenly notices he cannot open the top.

“What’s the matter?” Windy asks.

“I can’t open it.”

“Why?”

“It doesn’t open.”

“You know, I have a nephew who works for the fire department. I think I remember him saying they don’t have elevator ceilings that passengers can open anymore.”

“Why?”

“Well, I think he said so people can’t get on top of an elevator and fall. The only way to open the top of an elevator is by a key only firefighters have.”

“Blast!”

“Come down here, Martin.”

Martin steps down off her hands.

“Let’s try knocking on the doors and see if someone can hear us and get us out.”

Martin sighs and nods his head. They start pounding on the elevator doors.

“You seriously play Dungeons and Dragons?” Sloan asks Adams.

“What’s your hobby?” Tiffany asks Sloan.

“I play racquetball.”

“You…really?” Adams says.

“What?”

“Well…you don’t look like you’re in all that great of shape.”

Tiffany’s eyes widened, surprised at Adam’s candor. She snorts despite herself. 

Sloan turns red and takes a step into Adams. “For your information, I play racquetball at my apartment complex five times a week.”

“Do they have weights at your apartment complex because those are great for building muscle.”

“I wouldn’t talk if I were you, D&D boy. You aren’t exactly winning any Mr. Universe contests.”

“You know, maybe we should go and see what that tech writer and janitor guy are doing.”

“Fine. Let’s go.”

“I’m going to try and open the doors,” Reynolds says to the elevator.

“What?” Windy says on the other side.

“The janitor is going to try and open the doors,” Crystal says to the elevator a little louder than Reynolds.

“He’s a janitor,” Windy says. “He’s not maintenance.”

“Look, lady,” Reynolds says to Windy. “I used to work in maintenance at one point so give me a chance here.”

“Can’t someone call maintenance?”

“She already tried. No one is picking up.”

“Try again.”

“I’m going to get a couple of tools.”

Inside the elevator Windy turns to Martin and says, “They’re going to get us out.”

“I heard,” Martin says. “How?”

“The janitor says he used to work in maintenance.”

“People say a lot of things. Just because he says he worked in maintenance doesn’t mean it’s true.”

“Oh, I don’t know about that, Martin.”

“That’s why you work in HR.”

“What if he screws up and makes it worse?”

“I…have faith in him.”

Martin rolls his eyes. “Of course, you do.”

Strapping on his headlamp, Reynolds takes the stairwell down to the floor where the maintenance office is. The emergency lights light the way. Being a custodian gives Reynolds the keys to almost every room in the building. And that includes maintenance.

If one were to think about it this gave Reynolds a lot of power. And if one were to be honest it would not be the first time Reynolds has taken advantage of said power. He opens the stairwell door and heads over to where maintenance is located. He grabs his keycard on his retractable cord and unlocks the door. But once he’s inside finding the tools is another thing all together. He needs a drop key to get the loading system to open the doors. A drop key is a half a foot long metal dowl with a long flat metal knuckle on the end. Not a sophisticated tool but a necessity just the same.

Reynolds doesn’t mind rescuing Windy from the elevator, but he and Mr. Peak have history. It is tempting to just leave Peak in there, Reynolds thinks, but keeping the guy stuck in an elevator shaft isn’t the way to build back any bridges.

Reynolds starts searching on the shelves against the wall. They must keep it in here somewhere. He sees a strongbox on the top shelf. He grabs a Little Giant step ladder that’s leaning against the wall, opens it, and climbs up. Of course, when he checks the strongbox, it’s locked.

“Great,” Reynolds says. “Thanks guys.”

This of course means two things. Either he can try and figure out the code or he can break open the box. If he tries to come up with the combination for the lock, that could take a whole lot of patients and time, neither of which he has right now. There are four dials on the thing, and he’d have to get them all right. Prying the thing open sounds good to Reynolds.

He starts searching around for something to wedge between the box and the lid. But apparently, maintenance doesn’t like leaving crowbars hanging around. The room is well organized so if they wanted to keep crowbars in plain view they would have. But Reynolds is sure they keep them out of sight so employees can’t come in and borrow one to use on an annoying coworker.

Against one of the walls there’s a steel cabinet where every door had a combination lock. Beside that there’s a cabinet with a heavy metal mesh front. Aiming his headlamp straight inside he sees a couple of crowbars leaning up against the corner.

“Great,” he says. “Just great.”

Reynolds plops down in one of the maintenance chairs and stares at the locked-up tools. After a minute he picks up the strong box and sets it on the desk in front of him. He looks at the four numbers the lock is set on: 7392. He tries to open it on that setting but just as he figured it’s not the right combination. He sighs and with his thumb turns all four numbers to zero. He turns the first number to one and tries the lock. Then he turns the first number back to zero and the second number to one and tries the lock.

MY BOOKS

You can check out my books Chicane and the five installments of my Musicology book series Musicology: Volume One, Baby!, Musicology: Volume Two, Kid!, Musicology: Volume Three, Twist!, Musicology: Volume Four, Sweetie! and Musicology: The Epiquad on Amazon in Kindle and Paperback editions. You can also check out Musicology’s web site at www.musicologyrocks.com and vote for who you think will win Musicology!!!

STREAM OF THE WEEK: FREE GUY (2021)-HBO Max

October, November, and December are usually the months when the best and the brightest films of the year make their public debut. These are often serious films determined to make their way into the minds of Oscar voters. But after a big thanksgiving dinner they are probably not the movies most folks want to sit down and watch. During the holiday most people want something solidly written and entertaining which is why this week, before the slew of heavy stories, I’m recommending this one.

Guy (Ryan Reynolds) is a bank teller living a normal everyday life…except he’s not. His bank often gets robbed, there are shootouts and car chases in the streets, and he obsesses over a mysterious young woman named MolotovGirl whom he passes on the street every day. He first notices her when he hears her singing the song “Fantasy” which happens to be his favorite tune. It turns out Guy is an NPC (non-player character) in a video game named Free City, a highly popular multi-player game owned by Antwan (Taika Waititi) an unpleasant eccentric tech mogul and CEO of Soonami Studios who owns the game. Young game creators Keys (Joe Keery) and Millie (Jodie Comer) believe Antwan stole the code from their original game called Life Itself, a sandbox game which integrated a unique artificial intelligence programing into its NPCs. Millie plays the game on a regular basis trying to prove their code was stolen while Keys reluctantly holds a tech support job for Soonami Studios.

One day Guy takes advantage of his free will and confiscates a weapon from a bank robber (a real player) against the warnings of his best friend Buddy (Lil Rel Howery) a security guard. Guy shoots the robber and takes his glasses which allow Guy to view Free City as if he were one of the real players and begins his journey as a gamer.

Good afternoon. It is Thursday once again and I, Gigi the parti poodle am here to introduce the second chapter of my new story Power Gird Failure. The Maltese and I have once again been abandoned. We are staying with…him while my novelist attends to business elsewhere. I don’t know why we couldn’t go along. She told me I was highly demanding creature. I tell you truly am not a highly demanding creature.

Yes, you are. You are a highly demanding creature. Very, highly demanding.

I wouldn’t talk if I were you, you despicable Maltese. What with your constant need for lap time.

I would not need to ask for lap time so much if you weren’t always in our novelist’s lap.

I am not always in my novelist’s lap. That is absurd. How would I ever be able to go for walks or write or attend to my fans?

You have fans?

Of course, I have fans.

How do you turn them on?

What?

How do you turn on the fans and make them run?

That is the most peculiar question I have ever heard! In fact, it’s downright disturbing!

What is wrong with turning on a fan?

I don’t even want to go into those details, you cheeky beast!

I know our novelist has fans because I sit in front of one of them in the summer and it keeps me cool and happy.

You…Oh. Oh, I see. I am utterly embarrassed. Most utterly embarrassed. I must leave now.

Okay, bye…. And now I introduce to you Chapter Two of Gigi’s story Power Grid Failure. By the way, I knew what she meant by fan. I just wanted to get to introduce the blog for once.  

Power Grid Failure

by

Gigi the parti poodle

Chapter Two

Adams finishes working on Tiffany’s computer. Sloan watches as Adams starts to head back to his desk. Then Sloan zeroes in on the object of his desire. Tiffany pulls out her backpack, reaches in and retrieves her makeup bag. She takes out that tube of shiny gloss she always wears and slathers it on her lips. He loves it when she slathers that shiny gloss on her lips. It is the highlight of his day.

“Hey, Sloan,” Adams says walking up to Sloan’s desk.

Sloan leans back sharply in his chair. Was Adams on to him?

“I was wondering if you’d like to go get a beer with me.”

“Why?” Sloan demands.

“Well, not tonight. I mean its Monday and all. But I was thinking maybe Friday…”

“I don’t drink.”

“They have like a kicking root beer there. They brew it on the premises. And the bartender, wow, she’s cute.”

“I’m not your wingman, bro.”

“Well, no. It’s just…I’ve been cramming for my Cisco exam, and I could really use a night out with the guys.”

“I’ve got other plans.”

Reynolds usually starts with the garbage cans. He puts on his gloves and grabs the large bin with the wheelbase. He pulls a black plastic bag out from an industrial cardboard box, shakes open the bag and puts it inside the big yellow receptacle. He grabs the side of the receptacle and wheels it along behind him.

As he comes out of the custodian’s room and heads around the corner, he sees Crystal sitting at her desk still working. She’s often the last one to leave the office. From what he knows about her, she is always polite and well mannered. She always says “hello” to him when he dumps her garbage. Sometimes she offers him a snack like a pack of cookies or a couple of chocolates or a small bag of chips. She’s never chatty, however. Just always polite.

When he pulls the yellow receptacle around the corner today, Reynolds notices Crystal isn’t the only one staying late. That accountant guy is still at his desk, laser focused on the big guy’s office. Reynolds scoffs. Tiffany. That’s what accounting boy is focused on. What a schmuck. If that guy thinks he has a chance with her, he’s bonkers. Reynolds knows accounting boy follows Tiffany out every night without fail. They are usually the first employees to leave. But not tonight. Reynolds starts grabbing deskside wastebaskets and dumping the contents into his big yellow bin. As he does, he sees the lights flicker. He knows if they go out, he’ll put on his headlamp. They’d given out once before late in the evening after everyone had gone home and he’d worn it to finish his shift. It was no big deal. Reynolds continues towards Crystal’s desk. As he does the lights flicker again. He sees Tiffany rise from her chair and look up as if doing so will explain why the lights are flickering. Sloan hops to his feet when he sees her leaving the office.

He straightens his tie and checks to make sure the buttons on his wool coat are fastened correctly. Then he follows several paces behind Tiffany as she puts on her knit gloves and heads for the elevators. Just as Tiffany reaches the elevator doors everything goes dark.

“Whoa!” Adams, who is behind Sloan, exclaims.

Tiffany pushes the elevator button to no avail. “The elevator shut down,” she says.

“Guess we’ll have to take the stairs,” Adams tells her. “You want to walk out with me?”

“Sure.”

“I’ll walk you out,” Sloan offers.

Tiffany turns and gives him a quizzical look.

“Yeah, walk with us,” Adams says. “Safety in numbers you know.”

“Good luck with that,” Reynolds says picking up Sloan’s garbage can and dumping the contents into his big yellow one.

“What do you mean?” Sloan says.

Reynolds sets the garbage can down and puts a gloved fist on his hip. “It’s locked.”

“No, it isn’t. I’ve taken the stairs before.”

“Not during a blackout. In a blackout all the doors to this building lock.”

“Why? That’s stupid.”

“Looting and riots are why. The doors lock to protect you from going out and from them getting in.”

“You’re full of it.”

“Try it. See if I’m wrong.”

“Stupid janitor.”

“I’m game,” Adams says. “Let’s go.”

Tiffany turns and looks at Reynolds. He smiles a cocky smile at her. Tiffany furrows her brow then follows Adams and Sloan.

Reynolds watches them walk over to the stairwell and out the door. He looks over and sees Crystal still sitting at her desk watching him. He smiles at her. She stares back blankly. Reynolds glances at his Seiko watch and said slowly, “Ten…nine…eight…seven…six…five…four…three…two…”

The stairwell doors burst open, and Adams, Sloan and Tiffany emerge.

“Who does that?!” Sloan gripes. “Who locks a building in case of an emergency.”

“Not any emergency,” Reynolds says. “A blackout.”

“So, we’re stuck here all night or what?”

“If the power comes back on the doors unlock and you guys can leave.”

“That’s a serious bummer,” Adams says. “I have a D&D game tonight.”

“Seriously?” Sloan says.

“Yeah. You play?”

Sloan grimaces. “No.”

“Do you?” Adams asks Tiffany.

“I’m a darts kind of girl.”

“Really? That’s cool. Ever play on a team?”

“Yeah,” she says perking up. “We went to state last year.”

“I’ve never played but some of my D&D buds and I hang at this Irish pub, and we see teams playing there sometimes.”

“You seriously play Dungeons and Dragons?” Sloan says.

“What do you do as a hobby?” Tiffany asks him.

“Racquetball.”

“Really?” Adams says skeptically.

“What?”

“Well, you don’t look…”

“I don’t look what?”

“You don’t look like you’re in all that great of shape.”

Tiffany’s eyes widened and she laughs despite herself.

Sloan turns red and takes a step into Adams. “For your information, I play racquetball at my apartment complex five times a week.”

“Do you have weights there too,” Adams says earnestly, “because you look like you could use strength building.”

“I wouldn’t talk if I were you, fake wizard boy. You aren’t exactly winning any Mr. Universe competitions anytime soon.”

“Do you hear that?” Reynolds says.

“Hear what?” Sloan asks.

“Thumping or pounding or something.” He turns to Crystal and says, “Do you hear it?”

Crystal, who has been quietly eavesdropping on their conversation looks at them uncomfortably.  She rises from her chair and heads towards the elevators. Reynolds who’s been coyly leaning on his garbage bin pushes off it and follows her.

MY BOOKS

You can check out my books Chicane and the five installments of my Musicology book series Musicology: Volume One, Baby!, Musicology: Volume Two, Kid!, Musicology: Volume Three, Twist!, Musicology: Volume Four, Sweetie! and Musicology: The Epiquad on Amazon in Kindle and Paperback editions. You can also check out Musicology’s web site at www.musicologyrocks.com and vote for who you think will win Musicology!!!

STREAM OF THE WEEK: LOOPER (2012)-Hulu

Rian Johnson is a highly imaginative writer director, and this science fiction gem of his is one the most intriguing and smartest time travel films in recent years. What makes it unique is the protagonist and antagonist are the same person at different points in their lives.

Young Joe (Joseph Gordon-Levitt who also stared in Johnson’s film Brick) is a hotshot assassin called a looper. When the mob sends someone back from thirty years in the future where time travel is possible, Joe waits at the end of a desolate field and shoots the mark as soon as they arrive in front of him. Afterwards he disposes the body now stuck in the past which makes the murder virtually untraceable. Joe’s job is lucrative. He is paid in large silver bars he stashes under a trap door in his apartment. His direct boss, a man named Abe (Jeff Daniels who co-starred with Gordon-Levitt in the fantastic crime thriller The Lookout) groomed Joe from adolescence to be one of his top assassins. Joe’s best friend Seth (Paul Dano) is also one of Abe’s top assassins who happens to be able to elevate small things like coins, a genetic ability which has just started showing up in the human population. There is one major setback to Joe and Seth’s job: eventually the mob boss in the future sends back the looper’s older self to their younger self to be assassinated. Once that happens the younger looper gets to quit and live out the thirty remaining years of his life.

When Seth’s older self comes back, and his younger self decides to let him live it leads to dire consequences. And when Joe’s Old Joe (Bruce Willis) comes back, his older self decides to survive taking Joe on a cat and mouse odyssey with himself. Emily Blunt also co-stars.  

Good morning. It is Thursday once again, and I Gigi the parti poodle am here to introduce the first chapter of my new story Power Grid Failure. Although I am delighted to present you with a new tale, this has been a sad week for me. My novelist was called away on some unexpected business and the Maltese and I were left with…him. I have been standing at the door and staring out the window waiting for my beloved writer to come home. I have not been sleeping well and I wake up to find myself watching comedic movies to try and cheer myself up. Moments of panic overcome me. I think I am hearing noises. I long for comfort.

I am here to comfort you. I am Tucker and I am a Maltese.

Be gone, small beast. You bring me no solace. I am awash with misery.

Our novelist will be back soon.

What is soon? We are dogs. We have no concept of time.

You know it’s Thursday.

Yes, well…many other dogs have no concept of time. This is the winter of our discontent.

I think it is still Fall…

Oh, brutal agony! I am consumed with darkness and gloom. Will my sorrow never end? When will my dear novelist return to feed me, give me treats and stroke my gentle curls? I cannot eat. I cannot think. I pace about with no direction. Despair is my only companion. Come home, my precious poet. Return and tear me from my hideous torment!

It is okay, Gigi. You always have me.    

Oh, horror, you terrible beast! Why do you leave me with this cruel fate?

There, there. There, there. Would you like to borrow my Nylabone?

I despise Nylabones! They are wretched incarnate. Leave me now.

But I cannot leave you with such big tears in your eyes. There, there. There, there.

Pardon my sobbing, dear reader. Agony! Agony! Here is chapter one of Power Grid Failure. Jouir.

Power Grid Failure

by

Gigi the parti poodle

Chapter One

Monday, the day of the moon. It is early December, and the light has disappeared. A typical evening in the downtown Redoubt Tower. Everyone is finishing their workday. It is now five fifteen PM.

Fifty-year-old Martin Peak, executive does not want to go home. His wife spent an exorbitant amount of money on Christmas gifts on Black Friday, Small Business Saturday, and Cyber Monday. And Martin is not happy about it. They’d agreed to downsize their holiday haul this year because they and their two teenagers are taking a trip. But instead, his wife doubled it. Martin is looking for an excuse to stay late so he doesn’t have to go home, sit in his study, look at his credit card statement and lament over the multitude of charges. Despite spending every weekday morning running stairs at the university field house, Martin has packed on an extra fifteen pounds since summer. Probably from too many martinis because his wife will not stop shopping.

In the glassed-in area just outside Martin’s office sits the desk of his administrative assistant, an attractive blonde former sorority girl named Tiffany. Tiffany is fresh out of college where she finished a sociology degree. She excels in her choice of casual business dress having memorized the color wheel and knowing what shades suit her best. She started working for Mr. Peak a little over a year ago. She knows her boss has been grouchy all day which makes him talkative. He has popped out of his office several times to chat. Tiffany tolerates his chattiness as he treats her well and pays her well. Still, she would appreciate it if he would shut up.

Sloan is an accountant. He sits outside Tiffany’s office. Sloan is obsessed with Tiffany but has never once had a conversation with her. This, however, has not kept him from stalking her. He times his lunch break with hers and sits two tables away where he has an excellent vantage point. He follows her down the elevator at night and gets on the same bus she takes from the bus tunnel. He gets off at the park and ride and takes the bus all the way back to the tunnel and then catches his real bus home.

Sloan owns a toy poodle named Flora. He found her wandering around his neighborhood once when he went for a Sunday jog. All she had on was a purple collar with silver spikes and a round silver tag with the inscription FLORA on it. The tag bore no phone or address and after a quick trip to the local vet, no microchip. No one answered any of the social media posts he put up or any of the adverts he taped to the lamp posts around the neighborhood. Later he found out why. Flora was insane.

Across the hall from Martin Peak’s glass enclosed space is the office where Windy the HR representative works. She is a jolly, slightly plump woman with neatly cut short brown hair. She is around the same age as Mr. Peak. Unlike Martin however, she doesn’t require imbibing on lunch martinis to make her chatty. Windy chats constantly. About pretty much anything and nothing at the same time. On the shelf beside her desk is a large collection of plush beavers. It is difficult to believe toy companies make these many styles of plush beavers. Windy attended OSU and got her degree in Human Resources. Behind her desk is an abnormally large orange and black OSU pennant which is difficult to miss.

Over near the Janitor’s Closet is a small windowless room. This is where Adams the deskside support technician resides. A cot was installed in his office in case he needed to fix something overnight. Adams is one of those college graduates stuck in limbo waiting for his career to begin. He is a whip smart programmer who holds a degree in Computer Science. But a fulltime job at a major computer company always eludes him. Every week he scours the job boards for something he’s qualified for. And every week he comes up emptyhanded. A mountain, albeit a neatly stacked one of computer certification books sits by his desk. Some for Cisco some for the MCSE. He’s passed the first tests for the latter but has four to go. And having to work all day crawling around under employee’s desks telling them to reboot their computers or unplugging their personal fan or heater or whatever USB devices they have is a waste of his time. He is bored of being unchallenged and underappreciated and every week holds out hope that maybe, just maybe he’ll get a call offering him an interview.

Crystal is a tech writer who sits in the back corner on the opposite side. She is one of those young women who, unlike Tiffany, tends to blend in with the furniture. She is quiet and rarely speaks more than a few words to anyone on any given day. She is often tasked with translating a slew of business dreck into something legible but inane. She knows if you boil down all the graphics and verbiage presented to employees it is often better said in a few clear concise sentences. The problem is, of course, employees are not often fluent in clear concise sentences.  

Crystal catches the bus to work each day and steps off the elevators, goes to work, eats her sack lunch in the break room rarely ever purchasing anything from the cafeteria downstairs, works late and leaves without anyone ever acknowledging her. At night she writes erotic short stories worded with far more imagination than she has experience.

Right around this time Reynolds arrives on this floor of the Redoubt Tower. Reynolds is the janitor. He is fully aware that life sucks and aspires to nothing. He is oddly clean cut and reminds one of a well-groomed criminal. No one has ever bothered to educate themselves about Reynolds or all things Reynolds…except Mr. Martin Peak. But if they did, they would find a shocking wealth of information.  

Martin Peak reluctantly says to Tiffany, “I’m going home now.”

“Okay, Mr. Peak,” Tiffany replies. “Have a good evening.” As she says this the lights flicker.

“Huh. Weather’s been good out there. I haven’t heard of any windstorms coming or anything.”

“Neither have I.”

They both glance up at the light ready for it to flicker again.

“Well, anyway. You have a good night, Tiffany. You have any plans this evening?”

“No, Mr. Peak. It’s Monday.”

“Yes. Yes, I suppose it is. Well…have a good evening.”

“You too, Mr. Peak.”

As Martin leaves, the door to the HR Representative’s office opens and Windy steps out. “Oh, hello Mr. Peak,” she says cheerily. “Are you heading home?”

“Yes,” Martin says, suddenly aware that Windy wants to walk out with him. If this happens, he will have to have a conversation with her which will continue all the way down to the elevator and into the parking garage which was near unbearable. “And I’m in a hurry,” he adds.

“Oh, so am I,” Windy says perkily. “We’ll walk fast together.”

“Of course,” Martin grumbles.

At the same time Sloan slips on his blazer and slides his laptop into his bag. He glances at Tiffany who is still behind the glass. He slowly sits back down so as not to draw attention to himself and waits for her to leave. As he does the lights flicker again.

“That’s twice those lights have flickered, isn’t it?” Adams says to Sloan as he walks by.

“Yeah,” Sloan says. He watches Adams head over to Tiffany. She greets Adams with a smile before he crawls under her desk. Sloan realizes he’s going to have to wait until Adams finishes tinkering with Tiffany’s computer. He feels like a voyeur watching them.

Crystal had one more page to type then she could leave. She wanted to get it done so she could catch a bus before six. If she didn’t catch one before six it would take her longer to get home and she was hoping to see that new movie that just came out last night. She had no idea how she would tolerate her life if she didn’t have cable. She’d read ten books on the bus going to and from work this year. Cable was her only friend right now.

Reynolds saw the lights flicker a third time. He couldn’t care less if they went out. He had a headlamp. He could still see enough to do his work. His main concern was hot water. Would he have enough hot water to mop the floors if the electricity went out?

“What do you think is causing the lights to flicker?” Windy asks Martin as they stepped onto the elevator.

“It’s almost winter,” Martin says as the doors closed. “It could be anything.”

“I just want to get home.”

“So do I,” Martin said not because he wanted to get home but because he wanted to get away from Windy.

“Did you contribute to The Holiday Tree?”

That blasted Holiday Tree, Martin thought. Every year the company members were encouraged to pick a tag from a tall, bloated pine tree in the lobby and purchase a gift to give a child. It was a nightmare. He was supposed to take his family to Lake Tahoe for Christmas this year and everyone was on him about wanting new ski gear. And the boy wanted a motor scooter and the girl wanted diamond earrings and the wife already had three pieces picked out at Fox’s Gem Shop. How was he supposed to afford to get a kid a toy with all that burden on his credit cards? Not to mention he needed a new SUV. The one he drove was five years old. It was practically a dinosaur.

“I’m looking for the perfect gift,” he tells Windy. “I like to take my time and pick out something appropriate.”

“Oh, aren’t you sweet!” Windy gushes. “We’re buying two mountain bikes for a couple of kids this year.”

“Isn’t that generous,” Martin says wanting to kick her. Mountain bikes? Not one but two? Was she nuts?!

“Oh, you know,” Windy says. “We set aside a little money for charity each year. Even the twins chip in!”

“Yeah, well, there’s nothing like family participation, is there?”

“The twins have always been philanthropists you know. Philip is becoming an Eagle Scout this year.”

“Wow…you must be proud.” Martin’s son Devon was getting his “I avoided detention and stopped smoking Juul” award this year. Martin of course blamed the boy’s delinquency on his mother. “My daughter is in the school play.”

“I didn’t know she was into the arts,” Windy says. “We’ll have to come see the play.”

“That would be nice.” Martin’s daughter was playing a sizable role but only because of a bribe. If she broke up with her lowlife upperclassman criminal boyfriend and found at least one extracurricular activity, they would give her back her credit card. Money talks and boyfriends walk. Suddenly, the elevator stops. Martin reaches over and pushes the buttons, but nothing happens.

Martin tries the buttons on the elevator again. The elevator remains in limbo.

“Oh,” Windy says. “What’s going on?”

“I don’t know. But we’re between floors.”

“At least the lights didn’t go out.”

Just then the elevator lights go out.

MY BOOKS

You can check out my books Chicane and the five installments of my Musicology book series Musicology: Volume One, Baby!, Musicology: Volume Two, Kid!, Musicology: Volume Three, Twist!, Musicology: Volume Four, Sweetie! and Musicology: The Epiquad on Amazon in Kindle and Paperback editions. You can also check out Musicology’s web site at www.musicologyrocks.com and vote for who you think will win Musicology!!!

STREAM OF THE WEEK: WEIRD: THE AL YANKOVIC STORY (2022)-ROKU

This week’s film is one of the most anticipated of the fall season. Back in 2010 Funny or Die did a short starring Aaron Paul, Olivia Wilde and Mary Steenburgen called Weird: The Al Yankovic Story which was a spoof of biopics staged as a movie trailer. According to Al Yankovic, fans kept asking him when the actual movie was coming out and so finally Mr. Yankovic and the short’s director and writer Eric Appel got together and penned the script for the full-length feature movie now running on ROKU.

When I first saw the trailer, I genuinely thought Weird Al and Madonna had had an affair early in their careers. This made sense to me because these are two highly original, talented, intelligent icons who honestly make a more believable pairing than Madonna and Sean Penn. Sean Penn, let’s face it, dropped out of Santa Monica Community College after one semester and went full retard which earned him an Academy Award nomination but not a win. His also liked to punch members of the media in the face…which is good and bad. Somehow, he managed to win two Oscars.

On the other hand, Weird Al is a likeable personality who entered Kindergarten one year early, skipped the second grade, and earned a degree in Architecture from California Polytechnic State University, San Luis Obispo. Madonna has a 140 IQ and was awarded a dance scholarship to attend the University of Michigan. So, it made complete sense to me they may have dated. Sadly, they didn’t, and Sean Penn and Madonna ended up divorced to no one’s surprise. Some of the movie is true and much isn’t. That is half the fun. But I still wish Madonna and Weird Al had dated, married, had genius kids, and nurtured each other’s careers. That just makes more sense.

Young Alfred Mathew Yankovic (Richard Arron Anderson) is a weird kid. His mother Mary (Julianne Nicholson) and his father Nick (Toby Huss) don’t understand him. Especially when he shows a talent for changing the lyrics of well-known songs. One day a door-to-door salesman (Thomas Lennon) comes by selling accordions. Al’s father beats the guy up and tells him he is peddling instruments of the devil. But his mother purchases the instrument as an early Christmas present to Al and encourages him to practice in secret. Al does and when he becomes a teenager (played by David Bloom) he is enticed into going to a polka party where he shows off his superior musical skills. The police come and break up the party and Al is brought home where he has an altercation with his father and moves out before he moves back in and finishes high school.   

Young adult Al (brilliantly played by Daniel Radcliff) moves to LA and shares an abode with his three friends Jim (Jack Lancaster), Steve (Spencer Treat Clark), and Bermuda (Tommy O’Brien). Al proposes that he should pursue a career in making up lyrics to famous songs they tell him to go for it…and to go make them sandwiches. When Al goes to the kitchen, he sees a package of bologna with Steve’s name taped across it, is suddenly inspired and “My Bologna” is born.

Al gets a gig at a biker bar and is terrified to go onstage. But with the encouragement of his roommates who suddenly become his band he hits the stage with his future hit “I Love Rocky Road” and is discovered by none other than Dr. Demento (Rainn Wilson) who catapults Al’s career into stardom.

One day while Al is hanging out in his opulent Hollywood manor, he is visited upon by none other than rising superstar Madonna (also brilliantly played by Evan Rachel Wood) who seduces Al to get him to do a parody of one of her songs and the two of them begin a torrid affair.

Good afternoon. It is Gigi the parti poodle here on my usual Thursday. Today I have brought my novelist along with me. We have chosen to take a week off from storytelling before I begin my next tale so we can discuss how we go about doing our weekly blog post. First, however, I must say we had a wild and wacky Halloween here. We got a record number of trick or treaters which was delightful. I barked and ran for the door even more than usual.

We had planned for thirty spooky guests not thinking we would ever get that many. But not only did we get thirty we got quite a few more. My novelist, however, was prepared for an overrun. She’d set up a station before the festivities began, to bring extra treats out should we get more revelers than expected. And part way through the evening both of us were getting worried. The Maltese, as usual, slept through it all. We did treat bags this year that we preset earlier in the day so that every bag had an even amount of Halloween loot. But when we started to get low on our original batch, we had to start packing more bags. And after packing a few more bags more trick or treaters wiped those out as well. Finally, we got caught up and had enough treat bags to hand out by the time the evening ended. But it was touch and go for a while there. Next year we shall be even more prepared.

Greetings. I am Karen and I am a writer. Alright, Gigi. Would you like to discuss how we go about preparing our weekly blog?

Certainly. Firstly, the blog is broken into three parts: my introduction, one chapter of my story and a Stream of the Week which is a film, miniseries, or television show chosen by my novelist. Secondly, I do not write my blog story in the same way my novelist would pen a book. The difference is I do a speed writing session twice a week and take what I have spilled out on the page and refine it into the next blog chapter. Once the blog is posted I do not change or rewrite the story. I only go back and correct say a spelling or grammar error if I come across one. Otherwise, once it’s published on the blog, I must figure out how the next chapter of the story is going to fit. It’s a bit of a by the seat of my poodle pants way of writing. The idea for me taking over the blog was to see if I could connect the next blog post to the former one and end up with a complete story. Guerilla writing as it were.   

My novelist’s books by contrast are written with deeper research and more extensive rewriting. For example, my novelist may spend weeks or sometimes months studying the subject she wishes to write about. And the research for each novel is different. For instance, Chicane required interviewing expert race car and ski experts and reading several books on the subject to create the setting and characters for the story. She also spent days watching and rewatching film footage of the geographical terrain where the story takes place.

Musicology required she watch hours and hours’ worth of reality music shows to capture the essence of the competitions and their competitors. She had to draw upon her experiences visiting Burbank, California to create an authentic setting. Also, many of the characters have regional American accents that had to be carefully and consistently structured into the dialogue. As an example, one of the characters bounces back and forth between English and German and the character’s quirks had to remain consistent throughout the books.

There was an abundance of scientific research that went into her most recent novel. It required she read many books and technical papers and watched several interviews to infuse not just plausible but accurate scientific information into the story. She drew from her year long experience living in the community in which the story takes place to create realistic characters and settings. She also studied maps of the area to weave in details and quirks that one would not know about if one were not immersed in the actual location.

When we write our weekly blog, my story is usually the first part that gets finished. And if I do say so myself it is the most difficult part. The second most difficult part is choosing a movie of the week. Alright, my dear novelist, why don’t you talk about how you do the Stream of the Week portion.     

Thank you, Gigi. Each movie I choose must be playing on one of the streamers or on rare occasions YouTube. I do not choose movies one would have to purchase separately that are not streaming on any service. Gigi and I draw from Netflix, Amazon Prime, HBO Max, Peacock, Hulu, Apple+, Showtime and Paramount +. We may in the future draw from Roku as well. Hint, hint. Sometimes we may go in with high hopes for a film but find it falls short and then we must view a different one. We also try to point out some interesting facts about each choice if possible. Most of the time we try to choose films that may get passed over by viewers otherwise. Some of the films are newer and some are classics. The reason I like to do a stream of the week comes from my background in theatre and writing.  

Oddly, despite the large number of films available to stream these days, many audience members seem to gravitate towards movies which lack complexity, subtext, and structure. We tend to agree with the idea that superhero films are not cinema. Cinema requires a certain level of depth most superhero films don’t provide. There are some exceptions like Unbreakable, but most superhero films are specifically designed for entertainment and not for depth and do not qualify as cinema.

Cinema has to say something insightful about the human condition. And it often stands the test of time. This means it must have multi-layered characters, a well-structured arc, and a rock-solid premise. What we mean by a premise is a debate. For instance, if you were to look on the poster of The Usual Suspects it says, “The truth is always the last place you look”. That is the film’s premise and the argument it is trying to prove which it does very well. The Memento film poster says, “Some memories are best forgotten” which is the premise for that film, and it too proves its argument brilliantly. The original meaning of the word “actor” is plaintiff or lawyer. A person who states a case. If a film does not present a profound argument and fails to prove it well, it is probably not cinema. Some cinema is more character based and some is more plot based but the rule remains the same. The armature of the story must be a profound argument.

Now, not every film we pick is cinema. Some entertaining films are well worth the watch and so we choose some of those from time to time. But one cannot live on cotton candy alone. One must have nutrition. So, the criteria for choosing a Stream of the Week is that most choices must have substance to them. Alright, Gigi. Back to you.

Thank you. Finally, there is my introduction. I try to keep this brief, breezy and mostly off the cuff with the hopes it gives the reader something light and refreshing to start off with like an appetizer. Sometimes the Maltese will join me to add some flavor to the mix. And that is how my novelist and I construct our blog. Next week I will present the first chapter of my new story.

My name is Tucker, and I am a Maltese.

Get out of here! We’ve already finished!

But I wanted to talk about my contribution to the blog.

That’s delusional. You contribute nothing. Besides, you’re too late. Here’s a dog cookie.

Oh, goodie!

Thank you, dear reader for dropping by. Until next week, adieu.

MY BOOKS

You can check out my books Chicane and the five installments of my Musicology book series Musicology: Volume One, Baby!, Musicology: Volume Two, Kid!, Musicology: Volume Three, Twist!, Musicology: Volume Four, Sweetie! and Musicology: The Epiquad on Amazon in Kindle and Paperback editions. You can also check out Musicology’s web site at www.musicologyrocks.com and vote for who you think will win Musicology!!!

STREAM OF THE WEEK: WAIT UNTIL DARK (1967)-HBO Max

Rounding out our recommended Halloween films is this brilliant tense thriller of which its climax is considered the tenth scariest scene of all time by Bravo and ranks as the fifty-fifth scariest film of all time by the AFI. One of the things that makes this movie so great is it takes place almost entirely in a basement apartment in Greenwich Village which goes to show that you don’t need a lot of CGI and pyrotechnics to engage an audience.

The movie starts out with a twenty-something woman named Lisa (Samantha Jones) taking an airplane from Montreal, Canada to New York City. In her possession is a doll. Sewn inside the doll’s body is a fortune in heroine. At the airport Lisa by chance meets another passenger, professional photographer Sam Hendrix (Ephram Zimbalist Jr.). She asks Sam to hold onto the doll for her and she will pick it up from him later. As she is leaving the airport, however, she is confronted by a strange man who escorts her off.

A couple days later two conmen Mike Talman (Richard Crenna) and Carlino (Jack Weston) arrive at an apartment thinking it is Lisa’s, ready to pick up the heroine. What they find instead is the truly creepy Harry Roat (brilliantly played by Alan Arkin) the strange man who escorted Lisa off at the airport. He is dressed in leather, sporting midnight black hair and dark round wire-rim glasses. Mike and Carlino find Lisa’s body in the bedroom closet and realize Roat has offed her. They also find out the apartment does not belong to Lisa but rather to Sam Hendrix and his young wife Susy (Audrey Hepburn in a fantastic Oscar nominated performance) who lost her sight in a car accident. Roat blackmails Mike and Carlino into helping him dispose of Lisa’s body and assist him in locating the heroine filled doll. Roat is certain Suzy knows where the doll is and employing his two new henchman designs an intricate sting to get Suzy to reveal its whereabouts by using her blindness against her. The name Harry means “Home Ruler” and Roat is an archaic spelling of the word rote which means an unthinking routine or repetition. Susy means “Lily” and her last name Hendricks ironically also means “Home Ruler”.  

Suzy relies a lot on a twelve-year old girl named Gloria (Julie Herrod) who picks up groceries and other necessities for Suzy while Sam is at work. She comes and goes into the Hendrix’s apartment at will and has taken the doll for herself and hidden it in her apartment.   

The film is based on the play of the same name by Frederick Knott which premiered at the Ethel Barrymore Theatre on February 2, 1966, with Lee Remick playing Susy Hendricks and Robert Duval playing Harry Roat. Julie Herod played Gloria in both the play and the film. The play was so well liked by Warner Bros, they released it as a film on October 26, 1967. The fantastic Henry Mancini wrote the music. The budget was 3 million dollars. It made 17.5 million dollars. If you have never seen it, you really, really should.