Good afternoon. It is I Gigi the Parti Poodle here to introduce chapter twenty-one of my story Catzilla. As of late my novelist has decided to create what she calls a “panic room” whereupon when she leaves our humble abode, she puts Tucker the Maltese in the bedroom and shuts the door. She grants me free reign except for that blasted panic room. I am limited in my ability to open doors what with having paws instead of hands and no opposable thumbs. I am trying to come up with a way to enter the panic room in another manner so I can break in and torment the horrid mongrel as he deserves. But alas, thus far my novelist has thwarted my efforts. It’s not fair. I deserve the right to boss the little lap dog around when she’s gone but she believes in this horrid thing called civility. You need to play fair, Gigi. You need to be kind to Tucker, Gigi. You need to stop swinging that spiked mace, Gigi. Dreadful. It is horrifically boring wandering around the place with nothing to do. Yes, of course I write but then I get anxious. One can only play so many games of video solitaire before one goes mad. One can only sleep on one’s leather chair so long before one goes mad. One can only drink so much Aquadent laced water before one goes mad. In my mind I hear the call to rough up the Maltese and be satiated. Until then I will keep writing and planning until that glorious day when I breach the panic room and I am allowed to bathe in my glory. But for now, here is chapter twenty-one of Catzilla.  

Catzilla

by

Gigi the parti poodle

Chapter Twenty-One

The kitten leaned in. Its hot breath singed my cheek. From the corner of my eye, I saw Lyle slip his hand into his pocket.

“Briar!” my mom cried from the distance.

Suddenly, the sound of the forklift rumbled, and Aero drove up to the opposite side of the flatbed. He slid the fork under the kitten’s haunches. The surprised feline’s emerald-green eyes widened, and it turned and swiped one of its alligator-sized paws at him. The paw struck the overhead guard missing Aero but rattling the machine. Aero tried again to slide the forklift under the kitten’s haunches, but the creature swung a mean left causing the forklift to wobble and fall over on its right side. The kitten leaped on top of the fallen machine to examine its prey.

I heard the racing of dog paws scratching across the cement floor rushing towards their owner, their barks echoing against the pole building’s walls. Gavin sprung up and flew like Superman through the air landing on the flatbed with a thump. The kitten whipped around and slashed at its new enemy. The rottweiler sunk its jaws into the kitten’s front leg, shaking its head wildly as if he had just acquired a new chew toy. The kitten caterwauled baring its double set of teeth. Fritz viciously barked at the kitten and leapt up onto the flatbed to join its fellow soldier. It tried to bite the kitten on its large pink nose, but the kitten swatted at it making contact and sending the dog sailing through the air where it landed in the bed of Buckly’s pickup causing the truck to jolt.

I felt Lyle grab my arm and pull me away from the side of the flatbed. As he did, Gavin leaped up and sunk his teeth into the kitten’s throat. The kitten wailed and with its right paw flung Gavin off hurling him into the air. The dog flipped over and over landing on the flatbed on its side. The rottweiler struggled to its feet but fell back down whimpering. The kitten then snatched the fallen dog into its jaws, and bit down. The horrific sound of bones snapping filled the hollow pole building and in an instant the dog’s crushed frame fell, hitting the flatbed and bouncing off onto the cement floor like a bag of wet sand.

Fritz, suddenly aware of his companion’s demise, leapt out of the pickup and charged across the cement floor towards the kitten. He scrambled back onto the flatbed as my mother grabbed my hand and drew me further away from the action.

The kitten caught Fritz in his mouth and was about to crush him as well when the forklift roared to life and Aero somehow situated the lift under the flat making it jolt. The four football players rushed over to assist and began trying to tilt the forklift back into an upright position. The kitten, however, was not on board with this and hurled Fritz at them. Fritz, who was more agile than the kitten expected, managed to flip in the air sailing above the boys and landing on his paws behind the forklift.

“Lyle!” my mom called. “We need to get the dose into its mouth!”

“How?” Lyle replied thinking my mom was nuts.

“If we don’t that cat’s going to kill us all!”

“I don’t want to die, Mrs. Gagnon.”

“I don’t want you to die either, Lyle but we need to make this happen!”

Just then the forklift jolted the flatbed from underneath and the kitten scrambled to regain its balance. This gave Aero, whom the football players managed to tip back into an upright position a one up on the kitten. The football players backed out of the way and Aero was able to slide the forklift under the flatbed at the right level and tilt it enough to cause the kitten to slide off onto the concrete floor. Fritz came plowing up to the kitten barking and snarling. The kitten hissed and swatted its paw, but the dog dodged her and continued to bark and snap at her.

Lyle and my mother snuck behind the kitten. Lyle retrieved a Kraft caramel from his jacket pocket, unwrapped it and smashed my dad’s last pills into it. I ran towards them, but my mother waved me back. Lyle took the lead moving closer and closer to the kitten’s head.

“Mom!” I mouthed silently. My mom shook her head as if to say you can’t stop this and I was overwhelmed with helplessness. I couldn’t just stand there and let Lyle take the risk. He crept around the side of the kitten as Fritz kept barking and charging at it. Lyle inched around closer to the front of the kitten. I could see he was getting ready to toss the caramel into the kitten’s mouth. He pulled his arm back like he was going to send a bowling ball down an alley when Fritz charged at the kitten. Just as Lyle threw the caramel underhand and the confection became airborne, the kitten struck Fritz with her paw causing the dog to go sailing knocking the caramel out of its intended path leaving nothing between Lyle and the kitten. The kitten lurched at Lyle and slapped him with her paw.

I saw where the caramel landed and ran towards it. The kitten scooped Lyle up in its paw. Lyle screamed. I dove for the candy, but Frits ran in front of me knocking me over. I turned and saw the kitten bat Lyle around as if he were a toy. My hands grabbed at the floor trying to pluck up the caramel all the while listening to Lyle’s screams. Fritz dodged at the kitten again but this time he missed me, and I snatched the caramel in my fist and jumped around and yelled, “Here, kitty, kitty, kitty!”

The kitten dropped Lyle on the floor and turned its dark green eyes at me. It leaned in, opened its mouth, and hissed. I tossed the caramel underhand and it sailed into the back of the kitten’s throat. The kitten swallowed the candy as I ran over to Lyle who lay motionless. My mom rushed over and helped pull him away just as the kitten turned in our direction. My mom retrieved her mace from her jacket pocket and sprayed it into the kitten’s eyes. The kitten howled as we struggled to limp back to the truck dragging Lyle with us. The kitten wiped its eyes with the back of its paws, turned and headed after us. But Aero whipped around from the other side of the truck and zoomed up to the kitten putting feline and forklift face to face.

“Get in the trucks!” Aero yelled and the football players scrambled for their pickup.

“All you need are a few minutes before those drugs start kicking in!” my mom yelled.

“Rodger,” Aero yelled back.

With Lyle lying between us in the cabin, I checked his pulse as my mother turned over the engine. I looked out the window and saw Aero and the cat fencing.

The football players revved up the engine of Buckly’s pickup, whipped the truck around and drove towards the kitten. The kitten knocked over the small forklift again and charged at the truck. It jumped onto the hood and swiped at the window.

My mom opened the door and jumped down. She rushed over to the pickup, faced the kitten, and sprayed what was left of her mace into its face. The kitten shrieked, its paws swiping erratically in front of its eyes, losing its balance, and falling off the hood of Buckly’s truck. Aero climbed out of the forklift pointed at it and said, “This is the worst forklift in the world!”

“Let’s get out of here!” Buckly yelled.

Aero ran towards the entrance as Buckly hit the gas. Aero pushed the button, the doors started to rise, and the pickup truck zoomed through. My mom released the brake and drove forwards. As she did the kitten took a flying leap and landed on the flatbed with a thud.

“Mom!”

“How’s Lyle?”

“The kitten!”

“How’s Lyle?”

“He’s not moving.”

“We need to get out fast.” The kitten stood up and plopped its paws on the top of the roof. But my mom was not deterred. She barreled the truck towards the doors. Suddenly, the kitten slumped over on top of the roof. “The drugs are working.” My mom stopped the truck and hit the brake. “Let’s get out.”

“But the kitten.”

“It’ll be sleeping shortly. We need to get Lyle out of here.” Mom and I disembarked. “Aero!” she called. “Help!”

“But…”

“Now!”

MY BOOKS

You can check out my books Chicane and all five installments of the Musicology book series Musicology: Volume One, Baby!, Musicology: Volume Two, Kid!, Musicology: Volume Three, Twist!, Musicology: Volume Four, Sweetie! and Musicology: The Epiquad on Amazon in Kindle and Paperback editions. You can also check out Musicology’s web site at www.musicologyrocks.com and vote for who you think will win Musicology!

STREAM OF THE WEEK: COLLATERAL (2004)-NETFLIX & PARAMOUNT+

This week’s pick is one of those rare action movies that combines pensive meditations on philosophy with edge of your seat thrills. Smartly penned by Stuart Beattie and well directed by Michael Mann, this summer sleeper originally came out in August of 2004 and packed a wallop.

Max Durocher (Jamie Fox in a wonderful Oscar nominated supporting performance) has a dream: to own his own fleet of Lincoln Town Cars and run a limousine service. But he lives in fear of success and has been stuck in the same nightly taxi driver job for twelve years. One night a beautiful lawyer named Annie Farrell (Jada Pinkett-Smith) gets in his cab. She is on her way to a hotel to prepare for the first day of her recent court case. She and Max argue civilly over what the best and fastest routes to her destination are until she relents, and Max’s route turns out to be the most efficient. The two form a connection and make a trade: Max gives her the postcard of a serene island he keeps on his visor, and she gives him her business card.

Max’s next fare turns out to be a sharp-dressed man in a grey suit named Vincent (Tom Cruise in a tour de force performance) who at first seems polite and professional but quickly reveals himself to be something more sinister. Vincent offers Max $700 to be his only passenger for the night, which involves making rounds to five different locations to carry out his assignments all while providing Max with unconventional advice about life.

The movie was also nominated for Best Achievement in Editing for Jim Miller and Paul Rubell. Mark Ruffalo, Peter Berg, and Javier Bardem round out the film’s fantastic cast.